A Woman In Love

21 years live...

2012-01-17T23:00:00.000+08:00

For my 21th Birthday, I just wanna say thanks a lot to Allah SWT for giving me such a wonderful life to live :') He give me the real strenght, He show me the clear way to walk thru and, He show me who's my true love :') He make me falls till at one point, I feel like I'm breathless.. but then, he show me how to get up and make a new life. I'm lost in my way to the top but then, He give me the light and show me how to get there with faith and confidence. I thought I would never found someone better than 'the guy', I thought I'll not get over him, but now, God show me, someone else is better for me.. someone else is true-er than him :')

Thanks God, You give me such a great lessons to learn. I learn a lot, yeah.. I learn a lot from what You'd give me. Thanks for everything.. thanks for all your love to me, God Thanks you so much :') May this year be sweeter for me.

For the F guy :

Tahukah kamu apa yang ku pinta dalam setiap doa sepanjang hariku?
" Tuhan, tolong aku, tolong jaga dia...
Tuhan, aku sayang dia.. "

Aku tak akan berhenti menemani dan menyayangimu,
Hingga matahari tak terbit lagi..
Bahkan bila aku mati,
Ku kan berdoa pada ilahi unuk satukan kami di syurga nanti...

Ombak Kerinduan.. :S

2012-01-12T00:30:00.000+08:00

Tuhan tolong lembutkan hati dia untuk terima ku seadanya..

Kerana aku tak sanggup,

Kerana aku tak mampu hidup tanpa dia di sisi ku..

Tuhan aku tahu banyak dosa ku,
Hanya ingat Kamu kala duka ku,
Namun hanya Kamu yang mampu membuka pintu hatinya untuk cintaku..

Malam, kau bawalah rinduku untuk dirinya yang jauh dari ku..
Agar dia tidak kesepian, selalu rasa ada cinta agung..

Hujan, bawa air mata ku yang mengalir membasuh luka ku..
Agar dia tahu ku terseksa tanpa cinta dia di hatiku..

Hanya mampu terserah...
Moga cahaya di penanti...

You're Perfect To Me...

2012-01-10T09:00:00.000+08:00

All I ever wanted was to be part of your heart,

and for us to be together, to never be apart.

No one in the world can even compare,

You're perfect and so is this love that we share.

We have so much more than I ever thought we would,

I love you so much more than I ever thought I could.

I promise to give you all I have to give,

I'll do anything for you as long as I live.

In your eyes I see our present, our future and our past,

by the way you look at me I know that we will last.

I hope that someday you'll come to realize,

how perfect you are when seen through my eyes.

p/s : Today is the day, a year ago, we met :') How I wish I can turning back my time and look again the way you approach me? :) How wonderful the time is when someone who I never thought before would become this important to me? How I wish I return to the date and look back how this feeling grow? Thanks God, sending him in just to make me realize, wounds actually can be healed.. :')

When The Light's Gone :(

2012-01-09T08:55:00.000+08:00

Cuba kau dengar,
cuba kau cuba diam bila ku cuba untuk berbicara dengan kamu..

Pernahkah kau ada bila ku perlu untuk meluahkan rasa hati? :(

bila kau bersuara,
setia aku mendengar agar tenang kau merasa...

Siapa sebenarnya aku padamu?

Mungkin sama dengan teman lain yang bisa kau buat begitu.. :S
dan bila tiada lagi teman bermain,
kau pulang untuk dapatkan aku -.-

Cuba kau lihat,

cuba kau renung ke mata aku bila aku kaku melihatmu..

Pernahkah kau ada bila ku perlu untuk menyatakan rasa sakit dalam diri?

Dan bila kau perlu,
setia aku menunggu agar senang kau merasa...

Maafkan kerana aku tak pernah terlintas untuk menulis pada mu...
salahkan aku! :S
tak mungkin lagi aku meminta untuk kau mendengar..
tak mungkin lagi aku meminta untuk kau melihat ke mataku..

It's the End of Malaysia :)

2011-12-18T02:00:00.000+08:00

Yesterday, me and my colleagues went to UUM :) what a long jorney we had? More than 5hours to reach there -_- and I became supertired =_= heheh. but with my colleagues? hahah. I dont think I've much time to rest... :P they're superdupercrazy!!! hehehe.. I can't stop laughing :D what superlucky girl I am..? ;)

Actually, this is my first went to the 'border of Malaysia' :) I mean, yeah.. I went to JB a few month ago but that is our South Border.. and I never visit our North, like seriously. -_- too bad, hah? :( and yes, I never thought that I'll reach there like finally! :D Owh, I'm sooo lucky to have this chance :') I never thought that finally I went here, North University of Malaysia! :') aww my heart glows....

We reach there at the middle of the day, around 1.30 pm :) we are welcomed by Mr Amran, officer who's handling the University Inn. A lil bit discussion between him and my boss before he bring us to the apartment where the participants will stay :) Then, with a car, he show s where the activities will be conducted. So faaarrrr -_- they will need AT LEAST 3 buses to bring our participants to the location -_- haiyaaa this university is too large. but it still burn me a spirit! :') OMG. I wanna study here! I must get into here! God, I know you heard it! Please fulfill it! I'll never let everyone down... I promise :'S

The Sport Complex is superbig! :D I heard some of the student playing in the indoor stadium :D and I saw some of the students are practicing archery on the field. best seyyyy!! ;D I want it please??? :P Then, Mr Amran continue the journey, took us down to the NS area -_- hello Mr, are you going to let our participants playing this youth activities? -_- I'm sorry, but not so suitable with their age :( Ok. That's the final place before he bring us to the cafe and treat us a lunch :) wow, I'm honor with the treat. UUM is superb! They got their own students to handle everything! and all are Malays :D superniceee! I think it's very nice, especially to mastering their students in their respective fields before they step out of the university, and get plenty of experience :) I love it!

And you know what? The best part is when CC keep teasing abang Wan to attract some girls here! hehehe. CC is jahat! :P heheh. and abang wan is supershy -_- dari jauh can cakap besar, when got that chance, shy pulak -_- heh, abang wan.... abang wan... :P after parting with Mr. Amran and his staff, we went straight to the mosque. Errrrrr... Masjid.... Sultan badilshah, is it? -_- I cannot remember the name! :S but I love the mosque! :D and when I saw two girls just finish their prayer and.. I dont know whether they just return from the class or ready for another class, but it reminds me of my old memories :'S I wish I can rewind it back :( I want to feel again the feelings. How happy I am to be the University's student! How I wish I can go back to the time? :'( Owh owh there's future.... :') I will... I make sure I'll be back as a student as soon as possible! Yeah, I will! Please, gimme a path God :'D

Ok. I dont want to tell this, but this is weird :( along our visit in UUM, it was like......... its like a............ deja vu? is it? I dont know what it's call but........ every place I went, its like a hologram, I saw Mr.F everywhere around the place :S yeah, I never feel it before! Yes, I do miss and imagine him everyday, every second.. but not like what happened at that time....... you know the difference between imagination and hologram rite? what I 'did' before is an imagination. Remember and imagine him stand in front of me. but not at that moment! I feel the pain... it seems like, I can see him in hologram! My heart pumping out of the chest! and be the fastest beats ever! My heart feel like, he was here... my eyes seems can see he walk to his class, he did the sports activities.. and many things! what's wrong with my eyes?? is it a sign or it just.... no! I know it try to show me something, maybe rewind back his memories at here? :S my heart can feel it! and guess what? Everything's gone after we passing by the University's main entrance -_- yeah, when we pass by the gate, my mind is lose -_- I even like... "owh, what happen inside?" hmmm.... I know it bring some signs for me. but... what is it? :S

The 'Girls' Hostel :)

The 'Boys' Hostel :)

A few colleges or in other word, a few faculties in UUM ;)

And this is their Sports Complex :Dsuperlargeeeee! heheee and not

as large as my university before -_- heheh.

This is the area of PLKN (National Service) :)

Today is ONE year back ;)

2011-12-16T23:30:00.000+08:00

Just... a Happy Working to YOU :)

apparently, it has been a year you been with us

And everyone can see how much you've work hard for this.

And honestly, I'm proud of YOU...

Keep working, honey...

I wish you'll successful FOREVER :')

YOU're always in my prays.. in my mind... and eventually,

in my heart.

ILOVEYOU.

The Power of Love :)

2011-12-15T22:24:00.000+08:00

WOW! What a wonderful day, today? I feel so blessed! I feel so happy :'D but why today? Even I feel superexhausted, but nothing can compare the happiest feeling that I felt today :D ohh, so many surprises happen today and I feel like.... I'm in heaven! :D hehehe

Well,early in the morning, I accidently saw that practical guy wearing the same color as mine! :O hehe actually you like that, kan amirah? :P so just ignore it. Nothing pun.. perasan je lebih :P hehehe time flies superfast eh? Afternoon coming with someone who I didnt meet for a long time ;) I met En Shahril laah at the lobby :D wah, he looks skinnier :( aish kita both work hard, rite bro? :P he looks superbusy rite now -_-

Oh yea, I must tell ya that 'Casanova' guy is superduper merajok with me, heh. Hellooo, I don't want to persuade you lah -_- only slut will do that. Ok, is it to harsh? :S I just don't like you.. But itu was before, until you did that 'uncivilized' attitude in front of me, then it turns into grudge, and let me tell ya that I wont forgive you until God show you how to respect others. *sigh* They're sooooo true when they said " when you start to hate someone, everything they do will annoyed you" and yes! Everything he did just make my hate going deeper -_-

Ok, forget bout it. I don't want him to kacau-ing my mood :) Oh. One more thing, the mostbestpart in the story :P En Z has become our boss just now ;p a big WOW! ;p he's so calm laah.. I like him :D hehehe but he's really a boss laa.. I mean, he just replace my boss for awhile :) Nway, I still love him they way he is xp hehehe can HE become like that? :S I know he already :D but this boss sangat baik uhh... he didnt go out even during our recess time :) never meet this type of boss lah.. even my old boss pun mesti keluar balik rumah! -_- this boss just close his door and stay inside :) tidur dulu lah tuuu ;) he must be busy since he got to do both department at a time :(

well, after the second part of our last program end, and after we had our hi-tea with the guest speaker, I send her back. A lil bit conversation along the walk :) she's nice. And I love her. Heh :P but..... but.... I saw someone in front of the lobby's entrance... :S and.... and.... This guy makes me crazy everytime I meet him! :( oh Ghosh!!! It's HIM! :'D talking with Madam K? -_- bro, I no likey :( wait. it's not about jealousy, it's about anxiety :S but I still can manage my walk in front of him :P that's the best part actually :P pretending I'm okay in front of the guest but. actually I hope he look at me ;D he just return from penang sehh :D dont you tired beybehh? I'm so worried bout you :S but you're the one that keep my spirit high! :D ILOVEYOU :')

The embarrassing moment when I accidently shout (even with a flat tone) just to say "thanks" to her :S God, so shame! -_- what she will think of me? :S but my heart keep worrying if he's gone before I return to lobby -_- this love is supercrazy!! :S but wait!! *gulp* I saw abang fiesol? O.O what a...? why must I meet both guy at the same place? :| honestly, abang fiesol looks a bit chubby in that uniform :S me dont like lah bro.. :( wearing casual cloth makes you look more charm lah :) takpe... your job needs you to wear that uniform ;) hehehe

Quickly enter the lobby again to look for HIM ;) still talking with Madam K. something that I dont like -_- Its not that I 'dont like' madam.. I'm just...... sigh. so hard to explain. I just dont like to talk bout others :S people judge too quickly. and that's what I'm afraid of :( passing by them. and heard madam talk bout someone. I dont know who, but she looks like explain bout something terribly bout someone's false -_- sigh. my heart feelin' anxious after that :S something is kacau-ing my mind :( hopefully he'll not trust it until "that thing" is proved! :( please, dearLOVE? T_T

Ok. It's not a big deal. He, even looks so serious while listen to madam, still looks cute :D and... I saw his janggut mula naik :P Kau memang focus betul-betul on his physical kan amirah! :P and why I rasa dia nampak a bit sexy with that janggut? :P giler aahhh you amirah! ;p hey, nampak lah sikit peningkatan usia tuuu :P hehehe but what I most like bout our 'accident-met' tadi? Me and him, wearing the same cloth yang we pakai masa me still at the my old office :D still remember? the part where the first time he came with baju batik, Yellowish orange with red foliage :) nice for him to wear that (cause he always look nice in every shirt :P) but honestly, that mixture of colors didnt match well. Maybe looks more interesting if that red foliage was painted in yellowish gold or maybe yellowish chocholate :) yellowish orange? Its not that it didnt match, but the color cant mix very well. Looks a bit gloomy :) quite incompatible with his skin color and face :D and me? I'm wearing that Baju Batik 1Malaysia that ayah bought during his conference dulu ;) wow. I'm speechless :D why lately kita asyik kena-mengena je bang? ;p and guess what? I just finish my prayer to God that I miss HIM terribly, and accidently bumped into HIM ;D and.. and as the wound in your body slowly recovered after put an iodine, as well as that 'wounds of longing' in my heart which finally got better after looking at his face :')

Love Story ♥

2011-12-05T21:33:00.013+08:00

Argghhhh!! *scream out loud* You just dont know how happy I am right now, how big my smile at this moment! :D And you should know how much I miss HIM! :'D Ok ok ok. *take a breath* Lemme tell ya what's happening today :')

This morning, we have an executive talk with Tun Dr. Mahathir Mohamad, our former PM :) I just cant wait for it, not because I've wait for a very long time to meet my greatest idol, but this is the time for me to know whether what I thought bout my dream is true or not :S So, this morning, I'm so lucky cause I can park my car right in front of the gate :D so dont have to walk a distance ;p

First person I saw is Makcik Dalima :D She said, she saw Mr. F lastnite :D aww what a hardworking guy... :') Then, I went to the lobby to see what I need to do :) OMGhosh!! He was there!! ♥ Wearing white long-sleeve blouse with a navy blue necktie, he still look damn hot in my eyes ♥ Ghosh, crazy girl I am! :P He looks so serious giving the orders to his staffs especially our Cultural Artists :)I love the way he's working *melting*

I'm starting to tremble :S I'm the only one who's there without Mdm. Kas or CC Min or Abang Mie or Abang Wan :( The guests start to ask me whether they have to register or not. And actually I'm just worried if they ask more questions bout the program cause I'm taking leave during the process of making paperwork! :S I dont have much info to tell them! :S Next time, dont take leave during a big program like this, amirah... =.= A few minutes later, Abang Mie came :) sigh. Luckily! :D He ask me to go inside and help him send around the program books. Haisshhh... I thought I wanna stare cik abang a bit longer :( nevermind... we still have a few hours to spend with the guy :P

While I was busying pass on the program books to the guests, suddenly Mdm Kas come and said "Hello Azizaimi. Selamat Pagi" aiiii? Lain macam benor bunyinya? Ada apa-apa ke? :P and abang Mie is so proud of it =.=" HAHAHA! Then suddenly, I saw Mr. F! :O he was train the artist to accompany our Tun later :') Aww why I saw him so hardworking? Please, dont make me fall deeper, dear :S He looks so serious! but still looks stunning ♥ Then, he keep ordering and reminding people bout the arrangement of the event. awww he works really hard to make sure the program run smoothly :')

I keep working. Awww he really motivates me ♥ he still there. watching the arrangement of the hall. sigh, why must he enter when I was there? :P He's so eye-candy ya know? :P then he's up to the stage. maybe wanna see if the stage is in the right order... :) a few minutes later, I saw Mr. Z ;) aww they looks so sweet together :D what?? what the...? amirah! =.=" hahaha I mean, they look so sweet as a boss and his officer ;) but.. En Z should go celebrate Tun at the airport, right? =.= haiyaa... this boss ahh... sigh. Abang Wan said, he love En Z. So sempoi one! :D I knew it! Everyone love him :) and I wish Mr. F can be like that ;p Dont be so hard, dearlovelyguy *twink* He keep entering and out-ing the hall =.=" I know you're busy dear but please dont dissapear from my eyes :P but I still manage to capture his picture when he's talking with his artists ;D the best thing is... I'm wearing the same color with his choir artist -_- how come same?? Till abang Y perli-ing me and ask "You artis koir ke?" -_-' dah tau perli pula ya? :P

Then, when i saw abang wan and CC Kamal going out from the hall cause too many guests, I went to the door. Suddenly, while talking with some of our staffs at the door, HE came to shaking DB's driver's hand O.o Ghosh, I cant help besides smiling to him and.... he smile back! :D but his face still looks gloomy :( You're too stress or sad bout another thing dear? ♥ After that moment, he's missing -_- Mr. F is missing. I dont know where he gone and when all this happen -_-" I'm just too busy talking with abang mie and other guests -_- I wanna see him puhleaseeee *begging* only after a few moment, he enter the hall again with a striped black coat :') aww I miss you! ♥ then I went out again and stand at the entrance with Miss D and Abang Nuar :D aww miss D also here? :-\ I may watch some 'drama' over here ;)

My guess was true. Now I totally believe in my instinct. It was so true. And I pray for them. Nothing is wrong. Don't worry. Maybe they have strong destiny. And I wish, this time, Bro's prayer will come true :') ok with them. hehehe. Return to my story :D I saw him standing beside the door with Abang Z and Mr. SH, hehehe :P wow! he looks so sexy when he stand the wall with his hand!! O.O replace that Mr. SH with me :P then it will become the most precious and sexiest moment ever :P K. Dah start mepek -_- then I go stand behind 'abang-abang kompang'... suddenly abang Yus came and spraying us with the living room perfume -_- ini abang banyak gila lah!! heheh. I turn and look around. awwh, he was stand beside the door :) awaits. He looks gloomy. too tired, dear? awwhhh :S now I feel sooo uneasy :( feel like wanna go beside him and try to relieve him :'S we keep waiting. and I saw daddy's coming :D hahaha finally! but... he said he's gonna welcoming Tun at the airport? :-\ He shake with En Z :) with Dato SUB and others. and..... and..... OMG! Daddy's shaking him! :'D Awww what a sweet moment I capture! :') I feel like I wanna run to him and let daddy tell him that I was his daughter. Apparently there's something between daddy and him :| dad stop for awhile at him before go inside the hall and he, looks like really love daddy! :') I read his mouth. He said "dato" and smile. No meaning. I know. what I mean is after that smile. something inside his eyes. something is attracting daddy ♥

After Tun arrive, I stand at the outside :) FULLHOUSE. Useless to go inside, too full until you cant find a place to stand -_- stand outside and chillin with miss D :) Mr. F is inside and I dont know where he go... at first, I thought he sit with the other officers. So I try to find him. I saw En Z beside the 6th door, talking with his staff and I think, he may not sit. Even his boss stand, why must he sit with others? And I saw and proud, with Mr. Wong and Mr. Din who sit with others and not in the VIPs seats :) Tired of standing :( my heels make my leg feel so pain :S trying to survive. I went to the hall and watch the final discussion with Tun. OMG! HIM! Gahh... he was there!! (pointing at the behind of LCD Screen) he stand beside the host :) finally I found you, bro :P just realize he's the secretariat of the program... just realize? -_-" you're sooo outdated lah, amirah! :P awhh he'll be my inspiration. I'm gonna be hard and hard worker! :D I saw him give&take the mic to the participants -_- sian him :( then I went out again because I cant stand with the pain! my feet is getting worse! :S then nak masuk the hall again, cannot already -_-" the door is packed! when I saw Tun is finishing his speech, I'm walking out from the door and..................... wait for him to across the door. Hehehe

Finally! I saw him walking with the other guests going out from the hall :D I can feel my tummy full with the butterflies when he's passing by me ^_^ I saw him go stand beside the entrance again. and I walk there :P pretending that I'm awaits for both Tun to come, I capture a few picture of him ;p what a lucky day... hehehe. when Tun is show off, the media and reporters rushing to interview him! I hate this crowded :( I go stand beside CC Min and he ask me whether abang wan can shake Tun or not? Of course nottt!! That's why he's so dissapointed. heh. CC tell me, if I wanna shake Tun, stay here and try to shake. wokeyh Sir! :P Suddenly HE walk towards us and smile to me (of course to CC too :P) and I heard he whispered "sesak, sesak, sesaaak!" aww so cute! why you ebing so cute today, dear? :P and I know, only me heard that voice, not others :D I miss that voice! :')

Till the end, I cant shake Tun lahhh :S too many people. Then after I found he's no where... I decide to retrn to office :) Durinng in the car, i saw Kak Mili with others also on their way to their car :) I dont know who's driving but I guess between Kak Elly or Kak Mili, maybe kak zana? I dont know -_- after that, I dont know why, but when I'm driving out from the parking space, I saw one car. Looks like sport car, err ya know that I didnt know the cars very well, rite? -_-" so yeah, I dont know the name but I also dont know why I keep steal a look to the car using my side mirror -_- suddenly, my heart beats. It seems like.... the one who's drivin the car... the guy.... why my instinct tell me that it was HIM? Truth or lies? :S We enter the same road but.. after we passed the street cross between the hall & the mosque, he entered the middle lane, while me remain in the same lane. I took the chance to see the driver clearly. OMG! It's true! It was HIM! O.O He's driving the car? It seems like Kia Forte... Really? :-\ That sport car was him's? OMG! OMG! :O His soul is so young lahh. hehehe But when he's passing by my car, I saw him busy talking to the phone -_- dangerous, bro! dont do it again! :S And now I realize, the car that I always see in the PEB's space at the car park was his car -_- I thought who's too 'clever' hijack others space park without permission tuuu. So it was him... sigh :)

Hello, I Love You! :P

2011-11-25T20:23:00.008+08:00

" Pejam mata bayangkan cinta
Satu cahaya terindah dari jiwa terangi Jiwa
Kekasihku kau ku puja
Menjelma di langit musim berduka lara
Terpinggir sepi hampir putus asa
Melayar hari kelam yang tak bermaya "

Ghosssshhh!! What happen today? Is it a LUCKIEST day of the world? Why I feel superlucky today? :D I cant stop smiling! One by one incidents 'accidently' happen to me! OMG! OMG! I'm the happiest girl in this world today! Thanks God! Thanks for everything! Thanks for making my day! :'D

Ok. Ok. Back to the real story. Today, like past weeks, today is the last day for our 8th Group for IMG's course :) And today also we got Dato' Shahbuddin Hassan as our motivator. Heheee. Abang Mie's looks so scared! Be chill lah abang, nothing to worry about! ;) And what makes me feel so funny is when abang Ejai still mad on me :P hahaha. The idea to impose him by Mr. R is very effective, altho in reality I feel awkward cause I dont like to make people feel emotionally wounded -.- but its sekejap saja tu.. later he will be okay, rite? :) and I dont wanna pujuk him. He's not my case and I still agree with the reason why Mr. R wanna impose him :) Later he will know and basically, I'm so worried if what Mr. R talk bout him is true :( The way he is... towards me.... err.... I sometimes feel it too...

K. Lets forget that 'cheeky' guy for awhile. I dont want his merajuk turn off my happiest day :P (but imposing him is the one of my funniest revenge of my life :P) So during recess, me and kak sally with kak intan go buy a gift for our CC's daughter's wedding tomorrow :D so fun to walk with them! :D but I miss makcik dalima :( long time didnt meet her and I got news for her. sigh. when retrn to office, I continue gossiping with kak sally and most of the time, we talk bout our job :P still a gossip ke? :P hehehe. Then, around 3pm,I wanna go back to my own office. OMG! En S sehhh :)) Long time no see dear boss :P (dear lah sangat! :P) wah, looks thinner and more handsome eh? ;p this guy, if he didnt know, kakak and ayah already gossiping him with me -.- heh. they thought I want him lah tuuu :P the best thing is, he walk just to stand beside me. and when we enter the lift, I walk and stand behind him :P K. so gatal eh? -.-" hahaha

Guess what? Is there any rahmat or it just an accident or maybe this is fate when I decide to meet kak yat 5 min after I said to her "wait for me. I'm on my way now.." ? I said I 'already' on my way but I just start my way 5 min after that -.- hehe. so silly lah you, amirah! :P I go back to Level 9 and ask her bout our Elections Day. And when she said "This one, En E_______ already fill the form, but I dont know which silly form he filled" -_-" ni kakak memang tarak boleh harap :P heh. but.... when I heard his name, my heart scream out, wanna see that form -_- could you be more patient, heart? Then I ask her "kak, can I see him's, kak?" That kakak just give it to me and I just pretend like I read the form (walhal I just wanna see his writing, can cool down my heart longing towards him tau? :P) and even i'm a lil bit dissapointed when knew that he, as a leader for that election center, the only one can choose who wanna work with him on the election day, finally, I feel relieved when I notice that all of his staffs (I mean those who work under him during the election) was the guys except Ms. D! :)

And now, when that thing happen, I feel like, ok. It still ok if I cant work during that election day cause other than a bit disappointed, I dont want to work with others! and of course, nothing to worried because all that guys, can 'take care of him' :P hehehe. haiyaak! I'm superdupercrazy right now! Like seriously! O.o In that case, while waiting for the lift, I keep smiling for that 'good news' but... at the same time, I feel like something is going on with abang N and Miss D. When I remind again of what I've seen before, with what is seen in the form just now, it strengthen my suspicions against them *thinking* maybe I should stop think bout it. Not my business and I dont have right, kan? :)

K. The lift is open. And..... what???? Mr F inside it! :O Seriously! At first, I cant believe it! I keep asking myself "is it him? is it him?" Ghosh, that heartbeats make everything seems imaginary @_@ but luckily I can handle myself in front of him and ask "nak turun ke?" -.- and he answer " nak turun.. nak turun.." aww his voice! I miss it! :') but why he looks menggelebah? -.- ok. or maybe he sounds like bored? NO.... I can hear it clearly, he's menggelabah la! not bosan! or marah! :S dont put another question mark on my head, dear.. please :( and when I enter, he ask me where to go "mana?" and i just like "1.. 1" heheh. trembling again? :P and he push the button where I ask tadi :D aww why I feel so sweet? ♥

Suddenly kak Yam approach me :) ouh, sorry kak.. I didnt see you -_- eh, how come I cant realize she was there walhal I just walk and stand beside her -_- haiyoo.. this guy punya panahan is so strong! *wink* then akak ask me " where you go?" "to my old office lah kakak.. and why you wanna go to level 2?" " I wanna meet my old friend" Haishh, perli nampak? :P heheh. when we reach level 2, he ask her "who wanna go here?" can you imagine? kak yam just geleng -_- hahaha. when the lift almost close its door, then kak yam realize she wanna go there -_- aiyoo kak yam! luckily you can stop the lift. hehehe and I heard he laugh with me :') aww what a sweet moment I have ♥

After that kakak out from the lift, just the two of us in the lift :S God, why must this thing happen? Even he keep texting and I keep silence, *try to find a breath* and for the first time, I'm not so obvious to watch him straightly and pretend to look down, I still can see him with my eyes tails :P with a black long sleeve (but he fold up to the elbow), with a black pants and black tag and his 'golden' name, oh Ghosh, he looks like a sexy charm! ouh.. I ♥ YOU :)

Did you just go back from a meeting hun? This is our second time in the same lift after more than 8month :') and you did the same thing of what you did at our first dulu :P I hate you for that :P heheheh. Ghosh, if he know what is inside of my mind :( but better not. Accept it. Better not. Dont crush anything he hold right now. I really love him and nothing can make me cry for a happiness when see him happy even with the other women beside him :') I hope that's what we called as sacrifice. I hope. HE teach me a loads even he didnt realize it. Thanks ♥

" Hendak ku luahkan takut memakan diri
Hendak ku simpankan meracuni hati
Hendak ku jeritkan takut malu sendiri
Hendak ku diamkan kau takkan mengerti.
Biar susah bagai cinta zulaikha
Cinta dalam mimpi jadilah nyata
Biar pahit manis juga terasa
Hari ini hampa esok gembira "

The Shadows Of Inspiration..

2011-11-19T22:44:00.003+08:00

Aku yang merinduimu dengan sepenuh jiwa
Hati ku kosong bila kau jauh menyepi
Tercari-cari serpihan indahnya cinta..
Dalam keheningan malam mengejar bayang ilham
Antara sedar dan dilamun igauan cinta
Airmata ku mengalir dalam kepasrahan
Demi cinta ku rentasi belantara
Yang membelenggu naluri hatiku
Demi cinta ku selami samudera
Yang melemaskan hembusan nafasku
Aku persembah seluruh ragaku
Walau hanya sedetik dapat bersama mu..

Love Hangover

2011-11-14T11:04:00.005+08:00

" Like a movie scene, in the sweetest dream, I've pictured us together."
IMISSYOU. Dear Mr. F :(

I WANNA BE WITH YOU...

2011-11-06T00:57:00.005+08:00

I try but I can't seem to get myself
To think of anything but you
Your breath on my face
Your warm gentle kiss,
I taste the truth

We know what I came here for
So I won`t ask for more

I wanna be with you
If only for a night
To be the one whose in your arms
Who holds you tight
I wanna be with you
There's nothing more to say
There's nothing else I want more than to feel this way
I wanna be with you

So I`ll hold you tonight
Like I would if you were mine
To hold forever more
And I`ll save each touch that I wanted
So much to feel before
How beautiful it is?
Just to be like this

Oh baby
I can`t fight this feeling anymore
It drives me crazy when I try to
So call my name
Take my hand
Make my wish
Baby, your command?

** It's my 300th daysarries of meeting you in my life :') how long was that?
Almost a year. rite? ILOVEYOU.

Take Care, Love...

2011-11-04T23:28:00.007+08:00

I dont know why. For the very first time in my life, I can forget what I see on him yesterday :( I mean, it's not a good thing. This is my first time saw him with a gloomy face expressions :S during my time at TSUB Office, I never see him in that way. And now, I cant forget him and keep wondering and hoping, I'll know what's happening to him :( I've become too worried now. ITS ALL ABOUT HIM :'S

And today, I met Abang Z :) Not En Z, abang Z okaay -_- heheh. They make me confuse :P and now, I become so talkative with him eh? No shy-shy anymore? hehehe goooood :P at least, I may capture a few info about my love from him *glowing eyes* If can get laah.. -_- hehehe The most important part is, he gimme his number! :D Ghosh, naseb at the time he look at my fone, he didnt realize that my Mr. F is the one on the screen :P if yes, huh, I'm the unlucky girl lah... the secret will be exposed, rite? hmm... well, lucky lah :)

But the funniest moment and the most unforgetable moment during the course that i wont forget is the part where the 'secretariat desk' is taken off by Abang G hehehe -_- Can you imagine? He's the one. And he's bullying the other 169 participants!! -_-" wah, he have such a great power of bully eh? :P Imagine lah, after he fill our assessment form, he ask for another.. -_- I leave my desk just for awhile and when I come back, he had fill it more than 10 forms! -_-" such a crazy guy lah... and abang Mie said, for this group, we got 170 participants, but our boss will surprise cause we got 200 assessment forms -_- ya tak ya lah.. heh. he must asking himself, from where the other 30 forms comes? -_-" and the most horrible thing is when, abang G ask for other participants to fill the form and give it back to the secretariat. He give a warn : everyone must tick at no 9-10 (which mean 'excellence') on the form. Those who tick below than that, will be called for the course again. -_- abang mie said, if got another 10 people like him, world gonna be crush! :P hahaha

But that's not the main thing. Eventho it's kepoh for awhile cause our motivator didnt come, at least it can lighten my heart :S but seriously, I dont know where Abang G go because at the end of the course, he's gone -_- ni mamat, betullah. hehehe After rest for two hours to give our man time for Solat Jumaat, we got another surprise when Madam tell us that all leaves gonna be frozen this 8th Nov -_- wah, everyone keep talking bout it and CC is the one who feel so angry! Cause he said, he knew that Madam 'will' busy with 'something else' so, she put all the work on us -_- I just wanna know, who wanna come? HIM? Oh really? OMG! :D K. So poyo eh? -_-" hehehe

Because we have to conduct the course at the morning till afternoon, in the evening, everyone is rushing doing his job before start holiday -_- what to do? End of the year... and abang wan is so angry when he notice that 11 out of 80 people he has choose for BTN are actually been choosen for our IMG course O.o hah, he's so pissed off lah! Aiyoyo, I dont know! :P ok then. When I went to the counter to put the things for despatch on the counter, I saw the kakak, who win the Competition of Innovation Day that conducted by PEB :) but when I'm passing by the counter to go to the entrance,(because the entrance is a glass) I saw her staring at me :-\ why HIS stuff like to look at me like that? I mean the way they staring at me, so different :S is there anything else they want from me? *gulp* Or.... did my guess is true? :O no! no! no! no! Nooooo.. I dont think so! :|

Then, I'm wondering, is he was here too? That kakak is PT who take care of our Kombo & Kebudayaan Group, which mean she's under HIM. That's why I always wonder why his stuff love to stare at me? sigh. So.... is he here? I wanna go to Level 9, is he there? Can I have a chance to meet him? Ghosh, I really want! :S but then, when I enter the TSUB office, I cant 'see' any smell that tell me he was there :( so I made conclusion that he didnt come :S maybe just his stuff. hmmm...

Guess what happen during I'm on my way to car park? Hmmm? :D The PEB's formal car passing by me! :O what makes me feel so surprise is when I accidently saw someone beside the driver! O.OTrying to guess? Honestly, I really dont know whether it's HIM or not, but my instinct say YES -_- who will wear that checkered coat that I seen besides him? hah? ;P And that body style, body shape tell me that it's HIM. No others :( wait! wahhh.. I already know his body parts? Supercrazy ahh this girl! :P but... but..... why he looks so sad? I dont know whether he smile or not but my instinct said, he didnt :( He looks so gloomy :'( too stress, dear? Take a rest. Even just in a weekend, it still work. AT LEAST. I guess.... :S but watching him not smile, and with his gloomy face, it depressing me! :( how I wish I can share it with him? how I wish he know that I'm soooo worried of him? how I wish he notice that I'm very take care of his heart? :'S oh Ghosh, I wish he know but I dont want to... it may be a great mistake of mine if he know bout it :'(

" I can be your hero, baby.
I can kiss away the pain,
I will stand by you FOREVER..
You can take my breath away "

Believe In Hurts

2011-11-03T23:05:00.011+08:00

I Wish I can Give My Umbrella To You So That You Don't Get Wet When The Rain Falls.

Today is most exhausted day ever. I guess, it's the most exhausted in my life? :-\ sigh. But I guess future will bring me more tasks than now. Just wait and see. This morning, I have to handle the IMG Course. Imagine how can I handle 170 people by myself? :S Be strong. This time, I'm grateful 'cause they are so diciplined during the course :) And those Artis Budaya also looks nice today :D

In the evening, me and Kak Noni went up to Azlan Shah Hall to handle another program for our Innovation Day :) Another heart beats very fast! *gulp* You know why I feel like this right? Righhhhhht? -_- When I reach the hall, I saw two registration desk :-\ why lah? Oh... because we're inviting other PBTs to come and that one desk will be used for their registration, also for the winners :) Ok, that part, Kak Noni jaga please? :P I just didnt know how to layan them -_- (actually I dont wanna miss the moment when he's signing in his name :P) So, finally, I jaga my Council registration :D When the Artis Budaya came, they feel surprise when look at me :O Terkejut ke see me at the Level 10 after you see me handling your program at Level 2 a few minutes ago? heheh. So cute perr? :P But I guess the 'Artist' guy is more mesra than the girl laa.. even my smile pun they didnt give any response :(

After a few moment, YES. He came with his boss, En Z ;) Wahh, wearing same color eh? So cute lah his Batik's cloth. Bought it at Indo kah, abang? :) And I'm so panic to handle this two man -_-" why? it happen because I saw him looks like wanna walk straight to the hall without sign his name in -_- at the same time, En Z wanna sign in his name :S okay *find a breath* actually, my hearts is pumping out the chest when he's in front of me... that beats made me panic till i dont know which one to layan first! Walhal got two pens, just give it to them and let them sign lahh -_-

But why everytime he saw me at the desk, he'll randomly smile? :( Errr it just my thought, I guess he have problem. Just guessing :S After signing in, he enter the Media Office that's right in front of my desk. Maybe he found that En A isnt there, so he's out. And at the moment, I realize he look at me! :O While walking to the hall, he look at me, but when he realize I look at him too, he quickly turn his sight and keep walking :( Ishk, I know our sight collide at that time. Sigh. I dont know how many times I've capture him steal a glance to me -_-" A few times I guess. but during that collide happened, he looks so gloomy :S I guess, i'm right. The way he stare at me macam... want me to feel his problem. God, I'm worried! :'(

When saw him enter the hall, I guess my job done here :P Its enough. heh. So cruel eh? ;P But.. but.. so many guess didnt come yet :( Now I feel insecure. This thing is not good. Other guess from other PBTs has come but not from my own Council -_- Their reason? They even didnt get the invitation to attend this program! O.o how come that thing can happen? Our management has sent it to your department lah... :S Our Planning Dep also come ONLY when Tuan Haji start to scream -_- ask everyone why this dep didnt come yet? Naya lah bila Tuan haji buka his mouth *gulp* Until one time, the Director of Engineering Dep also come down 'cause cant stand with Tuan haji -_-" See? our people from Ir. Badrul's Sector juga the BEST among the BEST :P hehe. I love Ir. Bad lah ♥ hehehe (actually wanna praise him and Ir. Bad :P) That is the moment Mr R come to sign in his name. He did a complaining that they didnt get any memo for this program -_- haiyooo panasnya his mouth! :S The Engineering people memang kasar eh? I can see it in each of them. Kasar bahasalah... hmm :(

While I was talking to other secretariat, my eyes suddenly clash with his eyes! that make him quickly turn his view :O whuaaat? I thought he was in the hall? When he come out from there? Why I didnt see it walhal after stand for Negaraku song, I never turn my view around besides the door :-\ ok. maybe after that kot? hmmm... but the way he speak to the phone, he seems like he's facing some problems :S His face and voice is so serious. And as his secret admirer, I feel so worry :( I just hope the one that I loved wont be sad or face any problem. I just want my love to be happy all the time. But I know it's impossible :( Everyone has their ups and downs, rite? :'( So I wish he can share with me and I can try to relive him (at least).. but... it just a wishing.. till now....... :S

And now, he have turn his phone off. The convo has end. Now, Mr R come out and speak to him, I cant hear it clearly so, I dont know what Mr R ask him :( and he answered with a sigh in his voice :S Ouhh, he sounds so stress! :'( Now I'm moreee worried! :'S even I'm so happy that finally I can hear his voice after so long, but deep into my heart, I'm worried with his situation :( I cant deny it. He draws me into his situation.. Now I feel depressed too. Crying without reason. And every minute, he was the only one in my thought. No others.

" Sekeras ku berfikir mencari alasannya,
Semakin jatuh ku terluka "

My Love Deity..

2011-11-01T09:48:00.009+08:00

I Miss You. I Miss The Time.
I Miss Your Smile. I Miss Your Voice. I Miss Your Smell.
I Miss Everything About You :(

Today we have Inovation Day :) Like always, the names who'll attend the program only came a few hours before the program started -_-" why must those yang did all this delaying their work? Please dont lemme said that you're not efficient! :S I just dont like this type of people. They work well actually, but not EXCELLENCE -_-

Forget about it! Eventho I have to spend extra time in office yesterday to set up all the names, only one thing gimme the most shining smile in the world.....HIM ♥ *blushing* Give me a reason why I can not smile for this person? :P OMGosh, I Miss HIM truckloaaaads! :')

And this morning, I woke up lateee! O.o Almost take a leave cause my head is so so so heavy! :( but cancel it when I remember, today I'm gonna see him at the secretarial desk ;) Oh Ghosh, hopefully everything will be fine. Can you wear the same cloth you wear a month ago, abang? Puhleaaasshh *begging* you're gonna look supercharming in that suits :D

Around 7.55am, with the hunger and aching head, me and Kak Noni went up to Azlan Shah Hall at Level 10 -_- saw Tuan haji Musa and always, I love the way he manage his stuff :) He's sooo effient :D If only him yang only one effiecient, stuff tidak. Useless. Stuff need to learn from him. Seriously.

I'm waiting patiently, heh :P People came with a groups. That make our registration desk crowded! K. I dont like when it's happen -_- why dont they make a queue? The registration will be more easy, rite? Sigh. Officers pun cannot think ahh? :-\

in the overcrowding people, suddenly I saw HIM! ^_^ OMG! He's signing in his name at the book and suddenly, (when my eyes keep looking at him) my heart whisper "this is the guy who make most of people misunderstand with his status. the guy that abang wan said looks so young and looks like a single man. heheee" the whisper stop when HE turn to me and walk... towards me?? O.o Ghosh, my body's trembling and my heart stop for a minute when he smile and look at me.. deeply! OMG! OMG! I'm breathless *faint* I've to admit, everytime we meet, I falls for you over and over again ♥

He looks so stunning with black coat and a blue neck tie *glowing eyes* and..... and.. HE's wearing the cloth that I'm hoping for! He's wearing a light blue shirt! Same cloth as what he wear a month ago :D Ouh, thank you abang.. thanks for wearing that cloth :') Yeah, you looks so charming and handsome ♥ Now, we're wearing the same cloth like a month ago. Aww ILOVEYOU!

I wish I can follow him enter the hall but then, I guess I need to handle those who come. which is MORE IMPORTANT -_- sigh. A few minutes later, En Z coming!! :D Ouh, he looks damn cute! why all this boss must looks supernice and supercharming? Eye candy eh? ;P hehee Just wait for an hours, at the mean time, I try to search for him in the hall but cant catch him :( too many people inside. sigh. Nevermind, meet him even just for awhile is EVERYTHING to me. Nothing can compare that precious moment when I can see him by my eyes than other things in the world :')

I'm in pain...

2011-10-11T23:17:00.004+08:00

Aku sakit bila menatap matamu,
Sedarku bahawa engkau bukan milikku..

Aku sakit bila ku mengagumimu..
Sedarku kau tak pernah mengagumi ku..

Bangunkan aku dari tidur panjangku,
Sedarkan aku dari mimpi tentangmu,
Ku salah bila ku berharap padamu..
Salah ku fikir kau kan mengagumi ku..

Kau tak tau perasaan ku..
Dan ku tak mau kau tau :(

Aku sakit jika kau tau hatiku..
Kerna diriku tak bererti bagimu.

Aku sakit bilakah kau sembuhkan aku?
Tak mungkin,
tak mungkin...
sungguh tidak mungkin... :S

Mr. Simple ;)

2011-09-21T21:33:00.002+08:00

Today we got Raya Celebration with my company :) So, Mayor allow us to leave earlier!! In other words, we only work half day! *smilewidely* So nice uhh this Mayor! hehee So this morning, everyone is busy doing their rehearsal -.- while me (who didnt participate in any performance), just stay alone at the office *bored* Hah!

When the clock shows its 01.30pm, I quickly driving my car to the stadium! :) My heart beats faster! My mind just imagining HIS face. hehehe Itchy. But still, deep in my heart, I know it's hard to find HIM in this big stadium which will be filled with thousands people soon :( Ahh, at least can see HIM from far, jadilah... rite? :')

Enter the stadium, I saw the stage.. and heard one voice. SOunds familiar, but who? :\ oh, it's Mr. Os ;) So nice to see him here. I guess it's whether HIM or Abang Aprol who invite this person to become our emcee today. hehehee

tired waiting kak Sally, I went out to the main entrance to put my lucky draw's receipt in the box. While walking, I saw someone enter the door and my heart suddenly stop! *gulp* urgh. I forgot to wear lens and because of that, I cant see HIS face! :( I pretended to walk towards the door because the lucky draw box located there. hehehe My heart pumping put of the chest! It's HIM! Its the REAL HIM! ♥

He looks like... err... it seems like, HE try to tighten up his Baju Melayu button. Ouh... my hand rasa ter over ringan suddenly. I feel like, I want to help HIM ;P luckily we're in front of people. *blushing* Then, passing by HIM and put in my lucky drwa's number into the box :) Still pretended like I'm a blurr person who didnt know where to go -.-" HAHA. Supercrazy or what I ni? :P Standing right in front of HIM and pretended like I'm searching/ waiting for someone -.- huh, i become supercrazy lah today... hehehe meanwhile, I steal a glance towards him :P Urgh, HE still try to ikat his button lah.. poor HIM. I cannot help lah... :(

While try to tighten up his button, he talked with the AJKs. What a nice boss :) But, I still cant find a reason why he seems like try to run away from me. When I get close to him, he always turn into silence mode suddenly. Hmm... sometimes feel sad bout it :'( my heart gimme a hint and my mind gimme some reasonable answer for the hint, but I still confuse :( I hope this will not be long. I mean, this feeling, what I feel towards will not last long, I guess God is really busy creating my love story, that's why I still in here, cannot move on untill He says, the other chapter is done for me to go for a next level, rite? Hah! Wait and see lah.. :)

Well, there's a reason why I say like that. I wont tell it here. Dont want any controversy anymore. it hurts me what I've done before till everyone is hating me :( So let the past gone. Now, we go back to our present moment. heheee after he finally done with his button, he went out the door and talk with abang nuar ;) pretend like I'm dissapointed (pretend again?? O.o) and wanna walk in to the stadium :P then, cannot stand with it, I turn around to look at him for the last time, and.... oh no! he suddenly look at the door where I stand just now *gulp* did he saw I'm looking at him? OMG! OMG! I feel so nervous and quickly walk in to the hall *panic* urgh, you just made him more realize about it lah, amirah! -.-" why must run away? just stay. So uncool lah amirah ni... :P oh btw, he's wearing Orange Baju melayu! oh He's damn cute and sexy! ♥

Raya Open House today is a history! For me laahh.. I mean, guess what? I'm returning home at maghrib and reach home almost at 8pm O.o maybe some of you didnt care about it, but, I never get back at home that late.. :( Boleh, a few times I'm spending my weekends at the Pavilion till nite and solat maghrib at their surau. Cuma for me, it's too late for the prayer! :S sigh. Luckily the time still not end -__-

The Open House is fun but a few departments need to improve their performance next year. At least, practice a lot. Jangan syiok sendiri k? Audience cant feel it. And to those who think they can sing, practice a lot lah! Janganlah only when the time left couple days baru nak think which type of performance you want to perform! Dah sah cacar-marba! -__- this year, I can see how berterabur the performance is.. almost all. Only Finance luckily got stuff who can dance very well, Enforcement who got Mr Halim the director, to be the singer, he's superawesome ya know? His voice almost same like jamal Abdillah laaa :D and PEB? Dont know why.. they got Artist under them, a lot of dancers, a great singer, the awesome musicians, they got all.. but when comes to the performance... sigh. I guess Finance and Enforcement is much better lah! That's why I said, practicing is NEEDED! -__-

Psstt.. Mr. F**** you need to tegur them lah.. And you! As their boss pun tarak boleh think ka? -__^ haiyoooo... you're a good boss. A great officer. But. why cannot teach them lah? :( I'm dissapointed because I want the best from your group.. :S Nevermind. Next year please? ;) Show your credibility, love! :D

Dream.. Is it the true him or just an imagination?

2011-09-18T23:30:00.003+08:00

Lastnite.. was a something UNEXPECTED :) If I had magical power or maybe time machine, I want to rewind the time. It was so wonderful! plus, it was something that I've been wondering before and today, mom give me the answer (without her noticed :P)

I've been thinking about this all this while. Searching for the meaning behind all the dream, but, sometimes feel afraid if of what I did, if it is against our religion :( so today, mom's answer for adek's question relieve me. hehehee

Wanna know what is the dream? *blink*
I dont know where all this began but at first, it was not HIM. It's Abang Iqram Dinzly who was the 'main character'. I dont know how he can enter my dream and I dont want to share what happen between abang Iq and another 'characters' in the dream, let me keep it secret. Just me know. But I can tell you, based on what mom said, the dream of Abang Iq is just a 'dream'... not more than that.

I dont know when the 'hero' been changed, but... after Abang Iq get lost in one residential area, he drop me down at one terrace shops, suddenly Abang F**** appears! O.o He's no talking anything. Just keep in silence mode but still, accompany me at the parking lot :) sweet or not? *wink* He keep staring at me but didnt say anything. :( Deep down, I wish i can hear his voice cause I miss it so much! :S

We finally reach one hotel and I dont know how we reach there -.-" oh well, dream can bring us to wherever with whatever ways, right? :P beautiful scenery from the lobby. we can see the sea out there :) he such a sweet person lah.. hehehe me and him just stand at the window before we can enter our room. Still try to speak with him but then, he still same. Just look at me and smile without saying anything! :'(

Until the waiters come and bring us our "welcoming drinks" :) He dont want to eat. I feel weird but still okay. As long as I'm with him, look into his eyes, staring at his face, nothing can bring me down.. ♥

I dont know where they come from, but after a few activities I did with him, suddenly my nephews and niece are with me at the hotel and I brought them to the beach to play. He looks so worry and didnt allow me to touch the sea water. weird eh? Why only me? My nephews and niece who's younger than me pun he didnt say anything.. he take care of me just like a kid. hehehe so sweet what? :P although he many times obstructs, I still play at the edge of the sea water... so degil eh me?? :P

maybe get tired of it.. a group of boss call him and wanna bring him to somewhere.. but where all those bosses came? :\ I guess he's too tired when I keep playing without regard to his words, so he pull me out from the water bring me along with him -.- hehehe I dont care, as long as he care, I'm with him ♥

In the cab, the boss keep telling us bout the place's history and he looks so interesting. But, still quiet :( why he dont want to talk? He keep smiling but still, didnt want to let me go. Sometimes I feel like I'm his child in this dream -.- huh, a BIG no no please? If as someone special YES!! hehehe :P

My dream been disturb with adek's screaming! -.- He's so kasar know? Always waking up others rudely! :( I already said to him, if he continue with this attitude, no one will friends with him. Mom and dad are getting older, this method facilitating them getting a heart attack! Nak ke??? :| and now, my dream ends with an improper way.. :(

Haiyoo... now I feel so sad cause I even dont want to say goodbye to the dream.. when I can get the dream again? :( but honestly speaking, I can feel that all my dream before give me some hints. But yeah, only a few, and other "a few" just a fantasy I guess. okay. if my thought is true, so.... i'm SPEECHLESS :P but if not,then I think i'm just live in fantasy island. :|

It Has Been 250 days I've know YOU ♥

2011-09-17T21:41:00.000+08:00

Look into my eyes, you will see
What you mean to me..
Search your heart, search your soul
And when you find me there you'll search no more :)

Don't tell me it's not worth tryin' for,
You can't tell me it's not worth dyin' for,
You know it's true..
Everything I do - I do it for you :)

Look into my heart, you will find..
There's nothin' there to hide,
Take me as I am - take my life,
I would give it all - I would sacrifice..

Don't tell me it's not worth fightin' for,
I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more,
Ya know it's true,
Everything I do - I do it for you :')

There's no love like your love,
And no other could give more love,
There's nowhere unless you're there,
All the time, all the way..

Oh.. you can't tell me it's not worth tryin' for,
I can't help it, there's nothin' I want more!
I would fight for you.. I'd lie for you..
Walk the wire for you, ya I'd die for you,

Ya know it's true,
Everything I do, I do it for you :')

--EVERYTHING I DO, I DO IT FOR YOU (Bryan Adams)--

At the Moment I Love You ...

2011-09-13T22:45:00.012+08:00

It was about something I dream for so long. After a few month I'd been transfered to the new department, my chance to meet him become less. At that time, I guess I just have less than 10% to meet him in person or at least bumped into him :( and honestly speaking, I feel so depressed at that moment. I feel like I wanna die. Better than have a less chance to meet. Day by day, I feel like I'm a lifeless body. Going everywhere without a soul inside it. Terrible, rite? :S

Till the today comes. Its a surprise. It was the happiest news I ever waiting for :') I was told to organize one MS ISO workshop. Thats all. Remembering that HE's the one of the Auditor, I feel much happier. It was a DREAM, which turns into REALITY ♥ with a feeling of thunderous in my soul, with the butterflies in my tummy .. and hearts that increasingly vibrates.. I went to the Azlan Shah Hall at Level 10. Feel excited but at the same time, my mind keep telling me to not put such a high expectation on this. Yea, mind is right :)

Then, I wait for a few minutes. As someone who's been trained to come earlier than the participants, I must wait patiencely :) So, ONLY after a few minutes, they come. But honestly, I put my focus too much for his appearance till I cant remember whether Tuan Haji Amin or Mrs. Kasturi come first -.- my heart just cant wait to see him by my eyes after a few month we didnt meet each other. I keep walking around. Wait. And wait. Suddenly, Ms Salmah's phone ringing. I dont know who's on the phone with her, but I heard this person cannot attend this workshop for a reason. And my heart beats rapidly. Questioning myself : Is that him? If yes, why he cannot come? If yes, will my dream is just a dream? :S

Well, why I said like that because lastnite, I had a dream. A dream where I meet him in one meeting. I Guess. Cause I cant remember it clearly. Like I said (and I repeat it again), I'm too focusing on his appearance that finally make me forget EVERYTHING! :( I'm sorry....

Urgh. Forget about it. I started to feel depressed. Disappointment will haunting me for the whole day if he didnt appeared! :'S Just after a few minutes passed, after a few people started to come, after Ms Salmah off her phone conversation, only that, HE comes... Oh God, Thanks for answering my prayer :')

With his beige checkered coat, light blue shirt, red neck tie, black pants.. OMG. He looks damn hot! :D Do you think he realize I'm a lil bit stutter when I said "Could you sign there?" :S Oh, he smile at me and I'm melting awaaaayyy... ♥ Ahh! I wish he didnt realize it! He take his place at the front table. I'm trying to checking his name out, and.... what?? He's in a group with Mr. Roslay? Ghosh, I'm in trouble -.- HAHAHA! Mr. Roslay gonna tease me on :P

He put his thing on the table and he went out again for a breakfast. Aww is he hungry? *winkkkk* heheee actually, we offer a breakfast for the participants, heh, thats why lah he's going out :P nevermind, eat a lot yea, hottie? ♥ I'm trying to hide my emotion by pretending check the attandance list -.- heheh. Girl is so crazy when she's in love, rite? :P well, I know I've been 'lost' my mind since a few month ago :P

He return to his table and... why he was sitting in a place that contrary to my view? I mean, at his seat, he can see me sit here, staring him -_- heh. well, its ok. Then, during the workshop, I saw him turning his body to me, but because I'm having myopic, so i cant see whether he's looking at me :P or looking at the lappy? Haish, of course the lappy, rite? Work is much important lah! :D teehee then, he open his coat at hang it at his seat. looks like a cute teen rite? :P He's cold or not? O.o I'm freaking cold over here!! :S

My phone is ringing. Kak Sally's name appear on the screen. She invite me to go to Level 9 cause they're hosting Jamuan Raya. So I tell her that I'll be there a few minutes more cause I'm currently managing a program :) Sigh. Feels so heavy to step out from the halls :P I wish he will miss me :P K. So lame -_-" hahaha

I'm enjoying myself at the Deputy's Office till I forgot bout him for awhile -_- Gahh. I wish I will return there, cause all of them are the ONLY can make me smile like nothing's happen in this world :( Well, just wait and see.. :S

Return to the hall. When I open the door, they already finish. Owh, how I wish I can see him at least, steal a glance at me? :( Oh yes, he did! :D I guess... -__- hahaha Cause I see how quick he turn his eyes to the board when I'm turning my head to him :P Kantoi!!! XP hehehe After few hours, the speaker tell the Auditors to take rest and having lunch before they start auditing the chosen department. So, when the rest of the Auditors out (like always, my eyes keep watching him to know when he gonna out :P), suddenly Tuan Haji Amin call me to transfer all the info from the speaker's thumbdrive into his thumbdrive so that he can make a copy to anyone who want it. K, he's so efficient uhh :)

In the crowded of people, I dont know why I walk to Madam Kasturi -_- Maybe becuase I see him talking to the madam kot? -__-" Imagine it, I stand close to both of them, in the middle of the door, where everyone is rushing for their lunch! -_- why I become so crazy like that? hah? O.o err do you think he realize what I'm doing at that time? :S I guess I want to pretend that I wanna ask her bout the program, but then, I cancel it and go out to Abang Wan ;) Suddenly Tuan Haji Amin call Madam, he said someone is searching for her. I take that chance to look into the hall. Actually, it just a trick :P Abang Wan win. Madam just hear abang wan's calling while me? Pretending that I was searching for someone by looking around from the door -__- hahaha Our eyes clashed O.O but, I can see it.. I mean, there's a 1000 meaning from his eyes. Why he look at me like that? His face looks so sad. Is something happen, to him? :'S Quickly turn my view and rushing back to my office with a 1001 question in my mind and a 1000 beats in my heart :')

Till I went back to the hall, I still cant forget that stares :( what was in his mind actually? sigh. I wish I can read people's mind like Edward :-\ Guess what? First thing that across my mind when I enter the hall, I wish he was there and I may find some time to steal a glance towards him :P But? Hmmm.. Then, take my place at the secretary desk and searching for him, suddenly he enter the hall and look at me. But. He realize I look at him too so, he quickly change his view and rushing to his table. Another question appear? YES. Urgh, why my mind cant stop questioning his body language? :S Hmmmm....

After a few minutes the program running, Madam tell us to leave the hall, we can return at 4pm :( Halaa.. I want to spend my time learn that MS ISO thingy and stare at him along the time? hehehe Madam always like that :'( so, I step away reluctantly.. Hmm... my mind filled with his face..

Right on 4pm, I'm going up again to the hall and enter quietly :P I saw his back! hehehe *itchy* They're doing some paperwork and he has change his position.. halaa.. I thought I can see his face! Hmmm ;P So I sit at the secretary desk and continue dreamy :P sigh. I'm so bad, rite? Just looking at him, and saw him talking with other women officer who's OLDER than him... jealous? Eh hellooo. That women married already, if got Miss though, she's older than him! :S Hah, my feeling is not good, rite? DANGEROUS.

Saw him laugh with Madam, I wondering, would he do the same thing with me? :( why after I've been transfered to HR Department, he looks like wanna run away from me? He seldomly speak to me like before.. If he laugh though, he just laugh because another person has made some jokes! But if he only saw me, he dont want to smile like before... owh, I really miss that moment :'( but, his laugh is still the sweetest one! I fall for that voice ♥

Then, I just realize, at the time Madam gimme an order to give the MS ISO form for them to fill, why when I move to his table, he suddenly quiet and focusing on his work? Before I reach there, I can see how much he's laughing and joking with En Roslay -_- always like that! what happen to you bro? didnt like me? or just my feeling? tell me and help me! :S the weird thing is, he will continue chatting after I'm moving to another table -_-" please dont do that again to me :( you never know how much I'm hurt for that situation.. :S

The program only end at 5.30pm which mean, I just return home at 6pm -_- imagine how I want to redah all the traffic jammed at that time? :( and i saw he's going back, walking with Kak Ita, our accountant :) urgh. another jealous! :S haiyooo.. cik abang, cik abang.. why I must be this crazy?? IMISSYOU.

It's Our 200daysarries :)

2011-07-29T17:31:00.000+08:00

Listen to the sunset,
Can you hear its quiet sigh?
Listen, the sun is falling,
Watch it toning down the sky...

Soon darkness shall surround me,
Though twinkling stars will dare smile through,
While you are far away from me,
They'll frown a humble hue.

And as the sunset spreads its colors,
Horizons of gold and red,
I lie here all too much alone,
In this great, vast chilling bed...

For my world has stopped revolving,
'Til you return, time's standing still,
And the cold has settled 'round me,
With its stinging, breathless chill.

But my love for you keeps growing,
Standing fast to fight the cold,
Reminds me of your body's warmth,
And the story of love, untold.

So listen to the sunset,
Look up, hear its quiet sigh,
Though' we're apart these lonely nights,
My love whispers across the sky.

I'm still standing here. Waiting for you to come.
Even it has been 200days since our first met.
My love is keep growing.
And I keep waiting, waiting and waiting.
Nothing can replace.
I'm happy for this 200days :)

When the Dreams Come True...

2011-07-27T20:25:00.004+08:00

The whole last week was awesome! I never expected the week would be that great! Yeah, of course it mutilated with a few personal problems but it turned into wonderful when we meet, dreamguy! I myself didn't expect that a dream on that night is a continuation to our meeting in a real world. Oh, is it a dream become reality? You wanna know what's the dream about? :D

It was about me and him met in an event. I didn't know what event it is but he also attended and I was seen as the secretariat for the event. He looked at me but, because of nervous and worried if he realized I like him, I immediately pretended busy but I managed to steal a glance towards him and I realized he was watching me move away.
Only a summary of the dream because I woke up after I started moving away from the event. a bit disappointing? Yes. The dream should run longer, right? but it was stopped there. But I managed to turned, to look at him before my eyes are open.
When awake, I must confess I am somewhat confused by the dream that occurred over the last few days ago. Why? Yes. Why do I suddenly quite often dreamed about him, after so long I dream to have that 'dream'?

Guess what? That morning, I was asked to Organise a government-related event that also attended by him, his boss and his counterpart! Oh God, is it last night I dreamed about this situation? Do you know how my heart beats faster when my foot stepped to the event?
Sitting at the secretarial desk, waiting one by one officer to attend the event, beating in my heart even faster! And he's finally.... SHOW UP! ♥ Oh God, only You know how my heart is too happy this time! I'm still trying not to show my nervousness ahead of him.

City Audit Director : Where my name? If no, I dont need to attend, isnt it? (laugh)

I show the name and incidentally, he who's also behind the director laughed! Oh Ghosh, very sweet! ♥ And I began to melt ... LOL. You know what? When his turn come, you never know how much I tried to control the chaos that happen in me and trying to hide my body that trembling because of him in front of my eyes! Luckily he did not realize when I showed him the name that should be signed. X) hehehe.
Seeing he stepped into the hall, my heart feels happy. The way he walked that little look like childish makes me smile to myself in the crowded. Certainly he's very cute with the style. Oh, very serious effects of this crazy love! :P
Wait and continue waiting. Even at the 9 am later, I need to move to another place to manage another program. But I feel very hard to move. A few minutes then, his boss came! Oh, stay smart and handsome like him! The Boss that never stopped smiling :) Maybe that what makes his face was sweet to look at, right? and then, his counterpart also appear, serious but still looks sweet. hehehe.
I kept waiting. still don't want to leave. why? I think you already know why it happened, right? My hunch is true. he came out finally. Move ahead towards room of special officer of the mayor. I'm not sure what are they talking about but my heart strongly says they're discussing about the budget for the preparation of "press night" later. Well, he who'll ensure the success of the night, right? hehehe.
The room coincidently confronted with my secretarial desk and when he walked out, although he didn't glance over here, I'm still happy because I had seen him several times before heading off to somewhere else! The beginning of tremendous day! and then also, I immediately make a move to prepare the equipment to the next place. uh,your body light suddenly? This must be because very happy, right? hahaha. ♥

At the time I'm typing this blog, my heart suddenly disturbed, he might also have a glance on me as he passed in front of me? I might be happy if it is true, but ..... I'm sure, I'll scared if he realize that I keep seeing on him in when I notice he didn't look at me! Oh scared .. :S

Psstt.. he's wearing the black coat (like always) with the white long sleeve shirt and pink neck tie :) why I feel like he's so HOT? hahaha...

Tiada apa yang aku harapkan,
Hanya penghujung yang membahagiakan.
Moga suatu hari nanti,
Kau melihat aku yang berdiri di sini.

Beribu Sesalanku...

2011-07-19T21:41:00.000+08:00

Ku susuri malam ini yang tidak berbintang sunyi sepi.. Juga rembulan dah menghilang, dalam kelam ku sendiri. Ku mencari hembus bayu yang selalu berbisik madah rindu.. Kini membisu dalam sayu, tidak ku temu suaramu..

Kekasihku di jalanan yang berliku.. Di saat ku perlukanmu, tertutup jua segalanya terhadapmu... di sini ku tersedu-sedu... setelah cinta pergi, ku mengusung duka ini diiringi kisah janji dimungkiri lagi.

Sebak dadaku, Retak hatiku, Luka jiwaku dihiris pilu..

Jar of Heart :)

2011-07-06T20:50:00.003+08:00

My heart beats faster. The highly anticipated moment finally come. Almost 2 months, love.. almost 2 months, you and I didn't meet... Did you know that I was suffer during this period? And I never stop hoping that you may see me standing, waiting for you here..

And today, the moment that I'm waiting for so long finally come!

Saw you come up with a smart black suit, blue tie and wearing a white shirt with blue stripes, guess what? you looks very sexy, confident and very charismatic! I know, for some people, it sounded like an extreme compliment, but love is too crazy to enables everything. Something that I yearn to see everytime I look at your appearance.. Actually, you're very hot! I'm even unable to explain why you look so hot on my eyes... in fact, could it be too excessive if I said that you're very sexy? LOL. Well, people can say anything. Let me only the one who can see what's inside you..

Today began when he appeared behind the crowded, from the lobby to the stage. Walk through the row of the deputy secretary's office, he headed to the stage to meet my beloved ex-boss, Ir.Badrul. hehehe seriously, I don't know why my Ir.badrul like him so much? Let investigate after this? Nope. I won't do that to him.. it's out of my business. after talking for a while, he walked back down from the stage and through the rows of the office before heading to the lobby. Oh.. he needs to go to Pangkor Island at 11am later. Maybe that's why he seems in a hurry. But he still looks charismatic! And....... he's gone in the crowded :(

But I was speechless and amazed to hear those words from Mayor. Very impressed when heard the spirit and hard work he had, to promote our program. Willing to stay up till 3-4 am just want to promote the program? I really love you, baby.. I highly admire your sacrifices! I myself, not been able to promise to do that till late night. Congratulations, my dear... You've successfully prove the spirit of a great young man. Deep down in my heart, I admire your spirit and honestly, I swear... one day, I want to be like you. I'll prove it and you'll see me in the future AS you :)

I also met a few cultural artists who has just signed a contract with us. Just one message to them, please take care of your behavior and keep your manners. Most importantly, try to clean the image that people have hurl on your group. And to the culture artists under the age of 20 years old, please promise that you will not forget your education. You can go further, believe me..

Just one thing, my heart is restless. I don't wish to be prejudice, and I don't wish to be jealous. but deep down in my heart, I confess, I'm jealous. My heart getting restless, I do fear if you will be 'stolen' by others. Why do I need to have this kind of feelings? At this time, I was nervous, thinking of how you sleep there? How do you eat there? Do you comfortable on the bed? Do they provide the best service for you? The questions that should not appear in my mind.. SIGH. I'm worry too much :(

My heart grew excited when I heard the story that spoken by the aunty. He's attending the program on Sunday! I know, I should not cancel my intention to go there... there's no destiny between us. Oh... my confidence was too less in our destiny. but I will remain and continue to hope, that you will see me waiting here someday, or maybe ... until God determines the direction of my path again. Until I was ready to leave you and take another step. Thanks for your spirit. Thanks for your love. Even it was given in a silence, you're still the BEST in me :)

but my heart belongs to you.. ;(

2011-06-13T20:46:00.005+08:00

Have you ever appreciate my true love?
Have you ever know how valuable my pride is?

How great is your love,
when it gives me a million wounds...
how great is your love;
making me stunned..

I'm speechless by your side,
My heart vibrates..
but it's difficult for me to express "I love you"
My breath stopped when look at you,
my heart beat faster..
maybe your heart belongs to me, too?
Oh I love you..

I will capture you as a sweetest memories ..
I will not ever forgetting you..
My memories of you will stay in my heart,
to be the most beautiful in my life..

like a ship that was hit by a hurricane,
your love passion hit my soul ..
I'm tremble finding a peaceful land,
oh my love...

I will carve your memories,
in my heart..
to be the most beautiful,
ever happens in my life..

That Should Be ME...

2011-06-02T20:26:00.004+08:00

Future got so many unexpected surprise!
No one knows what it will bring us...
but God has the REAL reason why He give that 'future' to us.
Always be positive...
EXPECT THE UNEXPECTED.
Never give high expectation,
you may feel the the pressure,
and sometimes you want to feel the death.

I'm trying harder to accept the fact.
I'm trying harder to imagine the fantabulous!
Is it work? Is it relieves me?
No matter how many questions mark there,
The fact must be accepted!
It's a FATE.

Such a broken heart to know it,
but no one can deny it..
God know the best for us.
And there's always a reason behind every things that happened.
It's a PAINFUL.
But we must know that the PAIN is a LESSONS.
God knows very well why He give me the FATE..
I will never regret nor question it.
I know I'm gonna miss you.
But I know God wants me to leave you.
We still can meet.
But not as before.
But not too frequent.
I Love You.
Words that I keep in my heart.
Till someday, God give me what I need, not what I want..
And at that time, I know, no one can be the BEST as 'he' did.
And at that time, I know, you're just a 'simple test' for me.
But this heart, never and ever give up.
I'll keep prays that someday, you can see I'm standing here,
JUST WAITING YOU TO CATCH ME.

Before I met YOU,
I never know hot was it feel to look at someone,
and smile for no reason.
But it make sense with a person like YOU.
I.LOVE.YOU

Hidup Ini...

2011-05-16T10:21:00.003+08:00

Di saat ini, aku termenung sendirian. Mengenang kisah lalu yang tiada menghilang, mengimbas kenangan silam yang belum terbebas. Aku bersyukur, jika bukan kisah lampau yang menyingkap tadbir hidupku, kisah kini tak mungkin akan wujud.

Setiap yang berlaku ada hikmahnya. Aku terluka, aku ternoda dek dosa lampau. Aku hampir-hampir hilang arah dek ribut taufan yang datang mengaburi mata. Satu persatu ujian ku lalui dengan keluh dan kesah, namun terus setia berjalan, mengharap menemui penghujung yang mendamaikan. Segala perit luka, ditanam di hati... biarpun manusia di kiri dan kanan bersedia membantu, aku hanya rela bersendirian. Mengutip satu demi satu sembilu yang melukakan tubuh.

Jiwa terasa penat. jiwa terasa hampa. Hingga kini, penghujung yang ku cari belum ku temui. Tubuh teras semakin lemah, namun jiwa yang kuat terus memapah aku untuk meneruskan perjalanan ini. Kadangkala, hati tertanya, mengapa begitu sukar laluan yang ku jalani? Mengapa begini berat ujian yang menimpa? Namun iman yang sedikit menjawab segala persoalan. Meminta aku meneruskan perjalanan kerana katanya, di penghujung sana, ada cahaya yang bakal ku temui, ada sinar yang sedia menerangi, ada keindahan yang akan dikecapi, ada taman untuk didiami, ada teman yang setia menanti..

aku menoleh semula ke belakang. hati dipalu sayu. mengenang memori lalu, hati kadangkala rindu untuk ke masa itu. biarpun perit menujah kalbu, biapun sakit menghentam diriku, namun kesakitan itulah sebuah keindahan. Keperitan itulah yang memberi kekuatan. langkah ku kini semakin yakin. bersama semangat, yang menjadi pemangkin.

aku merenung laluan yang ku pijak kini. bersyukur dengan cahaya yang kian menyinari. biarpun masa lampau teras perit menghentam diri, namun perjalanan ku kini terasa semakin hampir ke jalan mati. setiap ujian yang melanda terasa dibalas kini. disebalik kekalutan yang menerjah diri ini, sedikit demi sedikit senyuman terukir di bibir. Memang Tuhan itu Maha Adil, hanya memberi, jika mampu mendepani. hanya akan dinikamti, jika kita tahu menyabarkan diri dan terus bersandar pada Ilahi. disebalik semua keperitan yang ku lalui, aku terlupa ada sesuatu yang melimpahi saat ini. Saat aku dibalut kekecewaan yang sangat menghiris, aku lupa ada insan yang sudah tersedia menanti demi membalut kelukaan ini.

bukan mahu mengeluh saja, hanya lelah meniti masa. namun ku sedar Dia Yang Berkuasa, memberi pengajaran ketika berduka. Aku hanya insan biasa, yang kini sedar dari sebuah lena. biarpun terlambat, ku syukuri jua.. nikmat-Mu terasa hingga ke hujung jiwa. Disaat insan lain mencatit nota bahagia, aku di sini, mengarang surat derita, namun ku bersyukur ku punya jiwa, yang setia menemani untuk meredah luka. pabila terkenang ke masa itu, hatiku bagai diragut cemburu, kau di sana hampir selesai menimba ilmu, namun ku di sini, hanya menanti waktu. :) ku syukuri jua apa yang berlaku, memberi kematangan dari setiap sudut. biarpun ku kini leka diulit waktu, namun harapan yang lalu tetap digenggam erat di dalam kalbu.

walau perjalanan ku kian hampir ke situ, namunku rasa ia tetap jauh. biar tersungkur dek musuh yang kerap mengganggu, akan ku tetap bangun meneruskan jalan menuju ke situ.. moga aku bisa bertahan, moga aku bisa menamatkan perjalanan. Mohon Dikau disisiku kini, Tuhan. Berikan kekuatan, berikan kesabaran. Hanya Dikau phon untuk ku bertahan.

" Di sepanjang perjalanan ku di atas laluan kejayaan ini;
ku lalui pelbagai lencongan yang bernama KEGAGALAN,
aku beberapa kali tersungkur dek lubang KEKELIRUAN,
namun aku diperlahankan perjalanan oleh 'bonggol' PERSAHABATAN,
kadangkala, aku terhenti di lampu merah PERMUSUHAN"

Kisah Hatiku :S

2011-05-12T12:26:00.000+08:00

Ku rasa hadirmu sempurnakan aku
Tapi cinta bukan milik kita
Semua harus berakhir

Cinta kau dan aku takkan mungkin bersatu
Untuk saat ini, di dunia ini
Mungkin tidak bersama
Hadir di angkasana
Biar ku setia menjaga cintamu selamanya...

NO. It will never happen.. :S

2011-05-09T15:49:00.002+08:00

I always go back to January! :P

2011-05-05T20:33:00.007+08:00

AKAK : Mira, could you replace me for awhile? I wanna go for prays :)
ME : Okay.

(a few min later, HE came in suddenly!)

HIM : Is boss inside?
ME : (shocked+nervous) err.. yeah, he's inside.

(HE's enter the room and see no one inside)

HIM : Eyy? no one is here..
ME : (still in nervous) err what? maybe he's in toilet.. :S
HIM : Oh okay. I'll wait at the outside.
ME : Oh okay. (suddenly HE pointing at something)
HIM : ehem... err... can I.. can i have that sweets? (laught)
ME : (lauught) err of course.. yes, err yes, just take it! hehehe (nervous)
HIM : I cant meet candy! I love it! (laught)
ME : It's okay (trying to control my nervous) it's for eat :P

(HE's out and akak saw HIM)

AKAK : Eh, En.F****! wanna meet boss?
HIM : yes but he's not inside.
AKAK : Oh boss is still not in yet. Mira, help them yeah?
ME : Okay kak :)

(I went back to kakak's place and heard him and his assistant talk.
Suddenly I heard boss out from his toilet)

ME : (knock the door) boss, En F**** is in here. HE wanna meet you.
BOSS : who?
ME : En F**** (gulp)
BOSS : Oh... En F****... okay.

(went to the waiting room and call HIM and his assistant)

ME : En F****, boss has come in, you can meet him now :D
HIM : Oh really? Thanks :)

(the 'drama' isnt end yet. I wait till HE came out from the room. I went in to the PA's room and send the letter I had receive earlier. it made me excited when, at the time I put the letter in box, I was standing near to him! You really made me breathless... His phone is ringing and he walk behind me to get away from those women. HEHEHE. I pretend I didnt see him and walk away to my room. I heard he still walk behind me but stop after a few step BUT still looking at me. Are you really want me die? HAHA. After a few minutes, HE wanna return to his office)

HIM : Okay guys.. Thanks. BYE.... (wave&smile)
BROTHER : okay... :)
ME : (smile and nod)

***guess what? it is the first time He's waving at me and the first time we talk for a long conversation :) Is it a sign? I dont think so, but yeah, its positive on me. At least, I can have a chance to create a friendship with him. Thanks for being super-friendly today. You put a smile on my face for the whole day! Hopefully no one will 'destroy' the smile tommorow -.- Its hurt when you know people is trying think negative about you. Hmmm...

Happy Birthday Dear :)

2011-05-01T00:28:00.000+08:00

I wish your a lovely birthday, Sweetheart,
I wish it would happen every day,
So I could celebrate you
With a compliment bouquet.

I’d say you’ve made me happy
Just by being you..
Your masculine charm delights me
In everything you do.

Your birthday is so special,
I wish I had the chance
Each day to show I love you,
With tender and sweet romance.

I guess I’ll just pretend
Every day’s the day of your birth,
Another opportunity
To show you all you’re worth!

HAPPY BIRTHDAY MR.LOVE! :')

You're my Firework! ;D

2011-04-27T21:13:00.004+08:00

I was told myself that was YOU..
but at the same time, I doubt with it.
I was tell myself that was a wrong person,
but my heart is beats faster..

and now here YOU are :)
YOU're in the car, the PINK guy? HAHA
Sounds sweet and sexy.
I can feel my feet cant touch the ground,
I cannot feel better than this,
and YOU just cannot imagine how crazy I smile :)

I can see YOU watching me from the car,
I'm not mistaken,
yes it was YOU who looking at me :)
how I can tell myself to stop smile for that moment?
we meet without words.
but YOUR smile is just everything to ME.

I wish we could meet up in other time.
I wish I could hear YOU call my name.
and I wish I can go across YOUR mind even just for a second :')

Rythm of LOVE

2011-04-27T14:27:00.003+08:00

You should know that I miss you supersomuch!
well, have a bright day, honey :')
wish to meet you again, love..

KISAH HATI :)

2011-04-23T23:13:00.000+08:00

Kisah dongeng.

2011-04-21T12:05:00.002+08:00

aku sedar aku tak seberapa.. :(
jika dibandingkan mereka yang lebih gah berbanding diri ini..
apa yang aku ada untuk perhiasan diri?
hanya hati yang ikhlas,
tersembunyi,
tersimpan untuk dia yang sudi menyintai aku seadanya,
yang sudi mencintai kau bukan kerna rupa.. :S

Dalam waktu sendu,
dalam waktu hiba,
aku mengharapkan DIA rela...

Sanubari ku memerlukan kehadiran seorang teman,
yang tulus mencurah kasih sepenuh hati..
yang sudi menyayangi aku seadanya,
yang sudi menerima aku, insan yang tak sempurna..
Atau..
mungkin itu hanya sebuah dongeng sahaja :'S

Just a fairytale... :(

2011-04-20T23:00:00.002+08:00

Hellooooo Earthling :)
Hows your day?
Any exciting story to share with me? :P
Cmon.. let us share the love yaw!! :D

Actually I've been busy since lastweek for our final preparation,
I mean my company is doing the tst to achieve Certification of 5S,
so yeah.. its a superbusy month right now :S

I really need a beauty sleep righ now but cant :'(
my body is so weak! :S
but have to strenghten myself so that no one worry bout me :(

yeah, my dream bout YOU still there..
when Makcik Dalima told me bout Madam (Library Officer)
now I realize that along this year,
all my dreams everynight has its own meaning.
mean, its not an empty dream :O
yeah, all my dreams got its own meaning :(
I just.....rea...rea..lize it :'S

K. back to REAL story :P
actually today feel so nervous,
my heart beating superfast and non-stop!
HAHA I just imagine YOU'll come here to meet boss ;p
That Madam comes actually,
so thats why ahh I feel so nervous,
if his staff were here,
possible for HIM to come, right?
well, it happens everytime HE came here,
so i'm expecting the same thing happen again and again :P

Just because you saw boss come out early,
doesnt mean HE wont come, amirah... :)
it happen in evening you know?! O.o
I just heard En Z's voice then I thought it was ears-problem -.- HAHA
I mean kot-kot lah other's voice yang I fikir En Z punya voice :P
btw just En Z yang suka puji/appreciate peopl so much know? :)
Not that others tak.. just I can see he's the most la :D

a few min later, I saw 'someone' who's too familiar in my eyes ^^
Yup. I know HIS body very well. HAHA *itchy* :P
Whoaa.. my heartbeats superfast seehhh :O
I swear I feel so tired :S
This heartbeats is just too strong till I rasa nak gugur jantung :'(
I'm serious k? No kidding...
feel like my lungs wanna break! :(
the feeling is mix..
yes this heartbeats made me supertired but in same time, Im superexcited!
HE doesnt saw me when HE's enter the office,
so I wait in the fron of main entrance to wait HIM :P
so crazy eh me? -.-"

Just around 4pm HE's come out with En Z :)
Waahhh the both handsom guy eh? ;p
yea.. I like En Z's personality,
he just too kind and I guess the most tender guy kot in here? :D
well I wish I can work under him someday ^^

I can saw HE jeling-ing me.
but why macam curi-curi eh?
err I mean HE looks like macam takut-takut..?
Cmon lah Incik F, nothing know? :P
The best part is..
when EN Z jenguk-ing me while me under the counter!! HAHA
Whoaa terkezut kejap *gulp*
HAHA serious, both of them are too sweet lah :D

K lah, so when I return home,
I pun dont know how to conclude my day -.-
Nak kata excited, sekejap saja.. then tired pulek
how? hmmmm

I was born in this way! :P

2011-04-19T22:43:00.004+08:00

I read the article bout this SEXIEST DADDY :P
Do read it at here to read it :D

Just wanna show you how supersweetandlovely HE is!
when read this, I'm flashing back my mind to 2006 :)
at that time, I'm still in Secondary Three.
I do like HIM when he's in AF but no that much,
I mean not as much as my classmate ;P hehee

Just look at him at that time, how teen he was!
4years he engage with Kak Allen know?
Till 6Feb 2010 when they're officially married,
I do proud with them :'D
14years since they were secondary school,
how strong their relationship? :')
Since 'cinta monyet' punya zaman lagi tuuu! ;)
After a year, they get Nadra Aryssa Jauza *sobsob*
What a sweetness enduring they have :')

Now, I give the pictures to you :D
Look how sweet he is!
**oh my, suddenly I feel like I wanna have a baby :'(

This is Diddy's Heartthrob, Nadra Aryssa Jauza :)

DIA :)

2011-04-14T22:02:00.003+08:00

Hadirnya dia sekadar persinggahan,

memberi pengajaran untuk tatapan,

daku bersedia jika inilah ketentuan,

tiada keluhan, tiada kesalan...

saat rindu mekar di hati,

pelbagai dugaan mengulit diri,

aku pasrah andai ini takdir Ilahi,

tetap ku tabah mendepani ujian ini.. :(

penantian ini tiada penghujung,

kau ku damba terus disanjung,

janganlah dipandang sepi jiwa nan murung,

moga suatu hari nanti kita bisa berhubung. :S

janganlah dipersoal hati ini,

hanya dia yang berhak mengetahui,

andai dikau sudi berkongsi,

hadirlah ke sini wahai pujaan hati.

melihat dia aku terpana,

bagai mimpi di alam nyata,

teringat dikau nun jauh di sana,

bilakah kita dapat bersua? :'S

kerinduan membara setiap masa,

berharap kau kan muncul di depan mata,

namun segalanya menjadi hampa,

kau ku tunggu tak muncul juga... :(

Munculnya dia bagai sang putera,

hadirnya pula tanpa diduga,

jiwa ini semakin berbunga,

berharap moga kau dan aku bersama..

setiap hari diulit mimpi,

melihat jiwa yang semakin terisi,

apakah benar dia raja di hati?

Oh Tuhan berikan petunjuk pada diri ini.. :)

bukan mahu berprasangka curiga,

hanya mencari kejujuran si dia..

andai benar mahu bersama,

ucapkan cinta, bersumpahlah setia..

sudah penat memendam rasa,

jiwa meratap melihat kau di sana,

niat di hati mahu meluahkan cinta,

namun masa menjarakkan kita.. :(

saat pagi menyusur pergi,

petang pula bertandang ke mari,

kau yang ku nanti tak muncul lagi,

harapan ku kini terkubur mati.. :S

hilanglah jiwa, hilanglah hati..

melihat kau bersama si jantung hati,

akan ku terus setia menanti,

moga suatu hari kau tersedar aku di sini..

bukan ku pinta untuk jatuh cinta,

namun tatapanmu bak pembasuh luka,

renunganmu menggugah seluruh jiwa,

kehadiranmu ku damba setiap masa.

usah ditanyal siapa dia,

di dalam hati dialah raja,

ku sanjung dia setiap masa,

biarpun kini jiwaku terluka..

bukan mahu bermadah kata,

hanya sekadar luahan rasa..

puisi ini puisi biasa,

jangan disalah erti maksudnya ya? :)

P/S : penulisan ini hadir tanpa dipinta.

di saat aku merenung masa derita,

hari ini akan ku catit di dalam nota,

hari bersejerah aku mengarang duka :')

100 Facts About Me ;)

2011-04-12T21:58:00.002+08:00

01. I was born a month early than doctor's prediction! ;p
02. I think Justin Bieber and Selena Gomez is the sweetest couple ever
03. food were never be my favorite. most of the time, Im hungry for a drink! :S
04. well, im just a small girl behind your back :P
05. Im the ONE AND ONLY daughter :)
06. A mommy's angel, daddy's princess and brother's babygirl :D
07. currently im 20years and 3 month old.
08. my shoes size is 8. a lil big eh? ;p
09. i love writing and mostly into poem and short story :)
10. when im in pressure, I would be a very 'jiwang' girl! XP
11. my first crush was Aliff Aziz ;)
12. Im very choosy in choosing a mate!
13. F**** made me soooo crazy about him! :S
14. I think Wali Band (Indonesia) made me fall in love with all their songs!
15. imma EXPLORER and I love trying out new things :D
16. Honestly, I love to be ALONE and begging you not to bother me please! ;(
17. I often judging people AFTER Im observing their character...
18. I often burdening minds with frivolous matters :'(
19. im just too cautious that made me think more than 100x before decide.
20. im nervous when facing someone (especially elder).
21. Im easily forgive but it almost impossible for YOU to regain my trust on you.
22. well I think KIM HYUN JOONG is the sexiest man alive! :P
23. Im a 'rules' person and hate it when things happen irregularly.
24. Im a respectful person and always expect the same thing from you..
25. i'll bluntly cruel when hurts sometime,better chooseyourwordwisely before speak.
26. I may looks painfully shy, just did some 'warm up' then U can see the true ME :)
27. "RUSHING" isnt in my vocabs. Imma slow&steady person :D
28. I can be irritated easily.
29. yes, I agree that Im too stubborn :P
30. to be honest, im not a confident person...
31. I dont like when people give me an attention. :(
32. I set a very HIGH standard for myself :)
33. I've a very silly humor that only CLOSE people notice it ;)
34. I can easily agitated.
35. im still trying to live my life to the fullest! :'S
36. im very hard to let you get to know me...
37. do notice that if I say something, I really mean it even it sounds like a joke.
38. I'll easily being moody when Im annoyed.
39. I dont easily share my problem with you..
40. im a strong believer of "Action speaks louder than Words" ! :D
41. I randomly making friends but, Im intensely LOYAL to those I friends :')
42. im very concerned about modesty in any situation :)
43. im easily sympathetic&persuaded.
44. im an independent and NEVER like to let others do my job.
45. im not a good advisor but I always have a shoulder to lend :)
46. when im in love with my job, i'll work hard no matter how hard it is!
47. im so LOYAL&APPRECIATE to those who I care.
48. im afraid of doctor till now.. :S
49. I just can do one thing at a time but that thing will be the BEST i'll did.
50. I always put a very high expectation in everything :(
51. im an agliophobia.. :S
52. its hard to unlock this heart 'cause once you open, I wont let you go.. :D
53. DearGuys out there, you have to workhard to earn love from me :)
54. I wont start anything, people have to start it first, sorry..
55. Im a coolhead mannn! ;p
56. I wouldnt trust people until the truth emerged :)
57. I prefer to give than accept.
58. when the 'defenses' are dropped, you'll get the warmest heart ever.. ;)
59. im not a flamboyant person and predictable.
60. surprisingly, Im a PLAYFUL :P but ONLY with whom deserve it :)
61. I dont like people who want too much attention.
62. im not a romantic girl but I'll be the SWEETEST girl you ever know! ;p
63. I just want a commited and real relationship. Never play with it...
64. I wont mad if you did wrong BUT I'll completely ignore you.
65. I wont give any commitment until im weighing everything :)
66. if you cant reach my emotion, you'll always get the hint if im not interested.
67. when in love, i'll love wholeheartedly for a lifetime... :')
68. I wish I can have a supersweetlovely daddy like Diddy Hirdy for my kids! xp
69. im not arrogant but I dont fit in easily with neighbours.
70. High tolerance.
71. Im very particular about appearance :)
72. Im trying harder to not hurting people around me..
73. when I focus on something/job, never call/talk to me, its USELESS! :P
74. yes, I do have trouble in expressing my feelings to others.. :S
75. im a cockroachphobia and lizardphobia :(
76. oh yes... I do being a selfish sometimes.
77. this lil girl become too 'ego' infrontof people sometimes.. :)
78. I adore baby like supersomuch!
79. I love heels and I dont have any flat shoes :D
80. currently work in City Council.
81. im allergic to seafood and dust. :'(
82. I love kitty cat like super-much!
83. 80% of my friends in Facebook and Twitter are American and Arabian :D
84. Most of my friends are guy, only the 3 are my bestgirlfriends :)
85. imma KPOP addicted!
86. I often get trapped into nostalgia... :S
87. when I was a kid, I dream that someday, im gonna be an actress! hehee
88. Siti Nurhaliza is my all-time favorite :)
89. "Harry Potter" is my all-time favorite film!.
90. Edward Cullen team is LOVED!
91. I love HISTORY somuch and a lil hate to SCIENCE :p
92. Blue, Pink, Purple and Black is my color.
93. im a half Siamese and half Indonesian :)
94. I think I still can work well under pressure.
95. I appreciate music much, no music means no life ;)
96. sorry but I confess, I always did my task last minute.
97. im only start using my phone when Im 15years old and the phone was Nokia1600.
98. im the one who is too cautious when it comes to FINANCE...
99. I love gadget and it takes me a changing of phone almost every year! :P
100. you think you can DEFINE me exactly? trust me, im mysterious that made you cant define me totally eventho you think you did..

" People will hate us, rate us, shake us, and break us.
How strong we stand is what MAKES us."

Any Questions?
Ask me at http://www.formspring.com/AmirahHusna :)

100days? O.o

2011-04-10T22:43:00.009+08:00

Its YOU. Its ME. Its US.
YES, it has been 100days since I met you on the first day.
Never knew that my feeling will become stronger. :(
I'm trying harder to throw you away,
but you're closer and closer to me. :'(
It hurts me to know the reality.
And I'm keep praying to have the strenght to let you go,
but the day I met you,
is the day where all this crazyness began :'S
I should thanks God who show me the way to get away from the PAST,
and I know I should thanks YOU for giving me such a wonderful feeling.
Yeah, I know what is LOVE from HIM.
But I learn to be in LOVE from YOU :)
100days give me a thousands memories between YOU and ME.
100days give me a reasons why I should stay HERE.
100days in 2011, YOU're the strenght that I need most.
Thanks for coming into my life.
I appreciate it a lot.
But now, its time for me to let go of YOU.
Its time for me to LOVE you as a secret lover.
My journey is still long,
and YOU, is just a reason why I choose this path.
May God give us some spirit to reach the success :')

Before :

" Now I realize,
during this time,
you're the one I love...
if that's not the reality,
why must I miss you? :(
Maybe I dont understand,
but I cant deny it anymore...
burden of this secret is burning me..
love might unspoken but the gaze story,
could it be left stranded?
my instinct whisper.. its not a dream.. "

Now :

" Did you know that you're my night and my day?
Did you know that you're my smile and my tears?
You are my EVERYTHING..
Look at here, look at my heart...
I cant live without you..
is not that I dont have pride,
but you really mean for me!
you're my breath..
you're my pride..
understand me…"

" Is that wrong for me to love you?
Even I know I'm not in your heart?
Am I too ego for having you?
Even I know you're not choosing me? "

Finally... :

" Should I say love?
my heart is happy but I'm worried..
you already owned,
I'm still awaits.
Come to me!
I know you'll come to me someday,
when you realize how much I love you..
I'll will always be faithful waiting for you "

I think I wanna marry YOU! :P

2011-04-06T21:12:00.000+08:00

Heyya sweethearts! ;D
Hows your day, sweeties?
Everything will going smooth as long as you enjoy it!
K. I talk like crap uhh -.- LOL!

Here, got a loadsa work to do!
for 5S certification final this April 21st,
we must make sure everything will be going smoothest! :)
*sigh* actually Im so tired,
bukan badan, but the mind is tired..
you know Im the one who easily easily burdened and easily depressed..
But yeah, actually I feel so guilty with sister.
I always and REALLY wish that people wouldnt misunderstood with me..
I mean, yeah my 'position' among them is most important to be kept :(
I dont want anybody said I'm so "lembab" when doing task.
Seems like I've to work harder than now so that people wouldnt misunderstood.

K. even dont know what those PA's sister think bout my job,
and im sorry if what i've said here wrong,
it just that.. its all about guilty know?
I just feel so guilty to you, kakak :'(
Sorry for the late '5S' thingy.. :'S

K. Back to today's story..
I think today was a super-fine day! :)
(even got small things that ruin my day :S)
I thank YOU a bunch for making me smile for the whole day! :D
So cute eh you? :P

HAHAHA. K. It happen this morning when I saw HIM at the entrance :)
after register my name for the "Executive Talk",
I walk to the door (cause I hope I can see HIM walk with his 'abangs' :P)
Oh! Its so surprise when I notice HE's infrontof me!! O.o
the 'naughtiness' comes across the mind :P
So, standing behind HIM so that I can see HIM without HE notice it! XD
HAHAHA. 'Toobad' when I stand so close behind HIM,
MyGaaad... HIS smell's too great lahh.. *melting* :P

HAHAHA. K. Is that too crazy?
Yeah.. im too crazy anything bout HIM -.-"
then we line up based on our own department :D
K. This one.. errr
mygaaad... I still have time to stare at HIM? *gulp*
heyyy tu mamat pun cannot stand at one point laa..
Sekejap sana, sekejap sini..
HAHA and I still can find HIM even HE 'move freely' :P
Yelah, first stand on the second row,
then when HE pusing-pusing and accidently saw me (I guess ahh :P)
Suddenly HE move to the 3rd row -.-
then belek-belek HIS fone, move again to the back -.-"
Malas nak ambil tau (kononnya :P)
so just pandang depan...
aaii? now HE's on the stage with the Deputies, Secretary of the Council and Mayor! O.o
So this guy actually memang cannot duduk diam eh? :P

Guess what??
HE looks so cute when stand behind Mayor (at the time of Mayor's speech)
bukan stand saja know?
HE macam... err jenguk-jenguk tau? :D
OMG! HE looks damn cute! HAHA
The BEST part is when En.Bad give appreciation to the Enforcement,
HE's trying to jenguk from the back of Uncle Syed,
and me too trying to jenguk from Kak Mazz's back :P
Duh! How come our eyes boleh laga ni?? XP
HAHAHA K. Teruk -.-
basically, I always feel yang HE's looking at me,
but at the same time I always said to my heart,
it just a coincidence :S

K. Be strong amirah :')
Btw HE looks super-sweet with the PINK suite today :D
Ghosh, I guess I've leave the 'PINK' style for so long :(
but but but HE's damn sweet know?
God, save me ;P
PINK + PURPLE = The Sweetest HIM ♥
Oh My.. HE really made my whole day! :')

Anugerah Bintang Popular 2010

2011-04-04T12:34:00.016+08:00

hey hey guys! :D
Lastnite I belive everyone having a good nite with the Most Popular Star Award, rite? :P
K. That when I'm translate-ing it from malay :P
Wah my englis so teruk meehh! O.o hahaha

Here the list of the winner :)

1. Popular Duo/Group
2. Mobile's Popular Artist

6ixth Sense

3. Popular TV Actress

Fasha Sandha

4. Popular Male Radio Deejay

Faizal Ismail

5. Popular Female Comedy Artist

Norkhiriah

6. Popular Male Host

Aznil Hj Nawawi

7. Popular New Male Artist

Shahir

8. Popular Female Radio Deejay
9. Popular Female Host

Fara Fauzana

10. Popular TV Actor

Remy Ishak

11. Popular Male Comedy Artist

Zizan Raja Lawak

12. Popular Male Singer

Faizal Tahir

13. Popular Film Actress

Lisa Surihani

14. Popular New female Artist

Ana Raffali

15. Life Achievement Award

Mak Nani :)

16. Popular Film Actor
17. THE MOST POPULAR STAR 2010

Shaheizy Sam

Awwhh :")

2011-04-01T12:01:00.004+08:00

Annyong World! :D
Hows your day, today? ;)
Thanks God Its Friday! :P

K. Suddenly got so many spirit here eh? :P
I wanna blog bout something..
Errr anyone know? LOLs.

K. Yesterday was surprising! :')
OMG. Damn he's cute! Hahaha
It just accidently happen or God just wanna fulfill my hope? :S
Whatever it is, HE really made my whole life! *hugs*

A few weeks before, or can I say almost a month ago? :P
I saw him at the canteen,
But before that, we met at the 'same place' in my office with the same cloth?
Haha sounds that I'm sooooo crazy bout HIM, kan? XD
Actually, YES. :(
(and I always hope for it to go away..)

and and... *trytocontrolbreath* HE came yesterday!!
Well "ZodiacFacts", you're right...
want HIM to notice me?
Expect the unexpected! LOL.
Now you got it... :P
K. Only ME know what thats mean :P

Terkedu. Terkejut. Terkelu.
HAHA yeah, so surprise when HE suddenly appear infrontof me! :')
And when HE ask me, "En Bad?"
I know that he really understands what I understand bout him..
K. confuse? Nope? GREAT!! :P

Continue... xp
I said to HIM "En Bad ada but he has guest now. Duduk kejap?"
He sit and..
err why I feel like HE staring at ME? :S
Oh Ma God.. jangan please.. jangan! jangan! :P
Well, if HE stare at me, then how I wanna stare at HIM? ;p hahaha

I just pretend like NOTHING and took my place back :)
Aunty Dalima ask me "who's the guy?"
And I said, "En. A*****"
Aunty ask again " Handsome tak?"
And I answered " A bit tall, handsomeeee *senyum nakal*"
Guess what aunty replied?
"Oh kalau handsome, makcik nak lah!" LOL!
Gilerr! HE's mine k? I dah book dulu! :P hehee

Then I receive a memo for En Bad..
I went to his room.
Why must YOU standing there, Mr. F****?
I swear, I'm over-sweating!!
Please dont do that again to me.. :S
Or I'll faint immeadiately! :P
That part ALMOST happen when HE said,
"Nak lalu ke? Silakan... silakan.."
God, HIS smell is so strong mehh!! -.-
and it still on my nose right now! :D

Bro, why MUST we still wearing the SAME cloth?
K. Both wearing 'Batik' and.. err why MUST same color? :(
HAHA it still in my mind now :')
And yeah, HE take back HIS place at the waiting room..
(psstt the room is right infrontof my desk ;p)
errr ghosh,
why MUST the 'problem' comes when HE's in here?
Not that big.. it just about boss's bill payment.
Agak ahh.. I've to call that club just because
Abang Bob didnt know how to do the payment -.-
Tak kisah... HE just stare at me when I talk to abang Bob -.-
why lah??? Stop it! I want to stare at you pulak.. :P HAHAHA
K. Now HE's tired of waiting.. =.=
Sian seehh sama dia...
finally, HE gone back to HIS office :(
Yesterday's morning, boss memang busy melayan tetamu..
Next time eh, cik F****? :)

Lunch time,
I went out with Brother Bobby :)
Well, actually agak tak selesa hang out with him..
Yelah, if in Group, okay..
But if just berdua?
Helloooo.. husband orang tu!
Even ada suara-suara gurauan, but still resah know?
Di office, everything can be happen tau?
Tak selesa because he's someone's hubby..
If the guy is still single, I tak worry sangat :)
But okaylah, lagipun Kak Ana(brother Bob's wifey) know me very well.
Nothing to be afraid kan?
But yelah.. I ni memang always resah for a small things -.-
Belanja-ing him makan Tomyam :D
OMG. I miss the tomyam so much!
Craving for it for so long know? :'(
Errr wait. why I macam kenal that 'Baju Batik'?
Errr is it HIM? Walking alone? :S
God! O.o want me accompanying you? :P

Guess what?
HE now, successfully make me fall in love with all the Wali Band's songs -.-"
Gara-gara caller ringtone dialah ni! hmmm :P

Ops. I just realize yang HE put a SMILE on my face since yesterday! :D
Now I cant stop smiling lah brother! :)
Ghosh, wishing to meet you again please?
What? Next week?
yeah, hopefully, it will... :S

HAHA K. K. K... the last one!
Yesterday kan, at the time I'm out from the lift,
Suddenly my boss came close to me *gulp*
I thought he didnt saw me, aik nak langgar ke? O.o
Yelah, my boss tu mata dia rabun tahap kritikal know?
Ruapnya.. he just wanna say this :
" Mesin tak betul! Kalau 3kali aku finger-print tak masuk, aku hempuk!"
HAHAHA Im just laught with him...
gilerr betul boss I tu!
Now he makin rapat with us know?
I mean, the more I know him,
the more I want him to be OUR dad!
HAHAH He such a caring boss guys!
Ghosh, I love my job.. *hugs&kiss*

K. the post is long enought :P
Bye.
See ya in the next entry yeah? ;)
Have a brighter weekends everyone!

My Confession :S

2011-03-29T11:00:00.003+08:00

It beat...it continues to beat...
Ever since I met you for the first time by chance.

I must of fallen, I must have really fallen for you.
I cannot stare straight into your eyes...

Your light hands, your white face,
I cannot even touch it once..
Saying I love you, to you.
Those words washed away when I'm in front of you...
Like the many stars,
it's the world's most abundant words!
It's only me who still cannot pull those words out

Just like a fool..
I am just like a fool..
No matter how many times I practice,
only wrong words come out!

If I could bump into you,
I'll walk slowly at the place you constantly walk,
Saying the words "I love you" thousands times to myself!
Even though I'm nervous, I will try to say it today.

I love you, only I love you...
Please say something!
Just hurt me this one time
Without anyone knowing,
just a secret between both of us
Lets love...

Guess The Song? ;p

2011-03-25T16:38:00.003+08:00

I wait, I wait for you broke up with your lover.
will not bother you with your girlfriend.
I will always be here waiting for you ...

I hope you'll love me later.
when you were not with your girlfriend.
I do all for you love me ..

Should I say love?
My heart's happy but worried,
There is also longing but jealous,
I still wait ..

came to me, I know soon you will come to me ...
When you realize how much I love you ..
I will always be faithful to wait for you ..

kalau cinta..jangan kacau! :P

2011-03-22T13:49:00.004+08:00

know that symbol? (^.^)
Its Taurus and Capricons :D
Matchable, rite? :P
K. just anna share some prediction of Taurus and Capricon compatibility ;)
Jangan maraah eh..? :P

Taurus and Capricorn Compatibility: A great love match

The union of Taurus and Capricorn is supposed to be a great love match and leads to a jackpot for both the partners individually. Both the partners have high regard for money and quality. The compatibility of Taurus and Capricorn will be the best in all the spheres of life. Both the partners take life very seriously and have a high security conscious. While the latter is very strong minded and determined in nature and the former have a practical and perseverance attitude. The common personality trait of both gives them a loyal and smooth life to each other and they will always be devoted to each other. Insecurity and Turbulence will never occur in their life.

Taurus and Capricorn Compatibility: A long lasting relationship

Taurus simply wants security and homely comfort and Capricorn requirement is to get recognition and rewards in life. Both have the ability to provide all this to each other. Though there are so many positive aspects still a negative and depressing fact in their relationship and this is big one. They both are too much serious in life and hence ignore the small happiness coming through their way. They miss all the fun only in trying to make it bigger next time. They both do not believe in any kind of superficial pleasures and make their life dull and boring. Beside this the duo gains excellent in compatibility score and share a great rapport with each other.

Taurus and Capricorn Compatibility: Great Chemistry

The union of Taurus Man and Capricorn Woman strikes a balance rapport and share a love bonded long lasting relationship. Taurus Man provide the security for Capricorn Woman whenever is required and needed by her and on the other hand Capricorn woman provides the trust and affection to Taurus Man. When we look on all the fronts of compatibility be it monetary, physical or emotional we find that the duo of Taurus Man and Capricorn Woman has a high and balanced rate in their life. They both exude positive vibes and have an enthralling in each other.

Taurus & Capricorn Compatibility: Problems and Guidelines

The chemistry between Taurus man and Capricorn woman is ever lasting and their match is considered to be the best pair in the compatibility chart. Both enjoy each other’s company and find a perfect solitude in each other’s company. Capricorn woman looking for perfection finds a perfect soul mate in Taurus man. The serious attitude of Capricorn is relaxed by the loving, caring and also trustworthy nature of Taurus. They tend to ignore the minor difference in their personality trait and thus make their love match a match made in heaven.

A great compatibility is seen in the match of Taurus and Capricorn. Astrologically the match is said to have some spiritual aspect and heaven made couple. The duo has the same approach towards life and is very practical. The ambition and the calmness of Capricorn attract the Taurus and the strong determination of Taurus attracts Capricorn. The focus of Taurus and Capricorn is in each other and because of their mutual understanding, faith and consonance their relationship never faces a problem and their life runs without any hurdles.

=================================**********

marah? jangan laaa..
I'm just sharing it :(
I dont totally trust it..
sikit-sikit adalah... :P hehee
janganlah marah! :(

Okaaay. I understand.
I pun wonder the same thing -.-
agak terujua with those facts kan? (^.^)
dont lie laa...
everyone will feel it!
Mulut je cakap tak.. cer tanya hati? :P
K. melampau -.-"
hahaha dah laaa..
takm0 marah-marah eh?
Ignore it kalau tak suka :)
BUT....
Helloooooo Taurus Guy! ;p **u know who you are ;)**

Love Hesitancy :'S

2011-03-21T15:35:00.004+08:00

okay. to be honest with you,
my life full of chaos since the LOVE came into my life :(
Dont worry "LOVE",
im not balming you.
But sometime I feel like...
"how easy is my life without you in here?"

If time can be played back,
I wish I can back to childhood...
time where I never know what's the LOVE means,
time where I can go to school without any worries,
nothing to be afraid of,
nothing to worry about.
have fun with friends,
can do whatever you want..
no need to think about someone we "care" about
except friends, teachers and parent :')
no need to burden the mind with the human's attitude.
and no need to think, why our hearts should be broken? :'(

But those time will never come again!
I should accept it,
and I should stop hoping for it... :S

Dear YOU, thanks for coming into my life.
It just for awhile..
but at least, I know you're appearance heal this wound for awhile.
Even just a second,
yea... YOU made it!
You made me think that not every love can be owned.
Not every love is united.
So hard to accept the fact,
yea.. nothing cant be tried rite?
and for this 3years,
after I went up and down with the "love"..
now I can feel the impact :')
Thanks YOU and..thanks GOD.
I know you're sending HIM just to notice me that
this is time for me to go..
the time for me to move on..
my heart is broken enough.
and I always remember this word,
"If someone you love is already taken, dont make them end up SINGLE"

Love is meaningless without sacrificing rite?
I know what I do now isnt a sacrifice.
but I know, if I do really love him,
this is the time to let go...
it's HARD but this the only way..
keeping my love for him will not change everything.
His love is for HER.
who am I to disturb them?
Intead, I should pray for them, rite?

It was 3years ago where I cant handle myself.
It was 3years ago when I lost myself.
IT WAS 3YEARS AGO WHERE I LEARN WHAT'S LOVE? WHAT'S HURT?
Now I want to live in peace.
I want to be a thankful person.
Be thankful for everything I have and accept whatever comes ahead..
Thanks for giving me such a wonderful life..

I just hope someday, I'll see the reason behind everything happened..
I always hold this words,
"God may not give what you want, but God always give what you need"
and actually, I still search for what I "need"? :'S
Do I too egoist when I still want someone like YOU?
Even I know who YOU are,
and Im standing between YOU and her,
YOU must know that I really wanna forget you.
It hurts me deeply in every second of my mind to YOU! :'(
but YOU, even you're the second person who really stole my heart,
gimme a BIGGER impact than the first one...
tell me how to forget you?
and why I must fell in love with someone who's already taken?
I did the Istikharah,
I did the Hajat..
but your shadow is stronger than before.
And you should know that I miss you so much right now..
Dont listen to heart..
Dont read my eyes,
I wont disturb you.
Lemme bring myself to somewhere I can find another men to heal this wound again :'(

"The greatest weakness of most humans is their hesitancy to tell others how much they love them while they're still alive." :(

oh Tuhan...

2011-03-18T15:12:00.004+08:00

"Dulu sendiri, kini sendiri..
Tiada siapa yang peduli..
Dulu menanti, kini menanti..
Dia yang dipuja-puja tiada di sisi..

Sesekali aku teringin jua..
Untuk merasakan manisnya cinta..
Namun mengapa ku tak berdaya menggapainya?
Mungkin itu suratan azali.."

kadangkala kerinduan itu bertandang..
kadangkala hati ini menjadi gersang..
tatkala menatap gambar mu,
aku terpaksa akui,
jiwa ini semakin kosng...
rasa ini kian pudar...
aku berusaha untuk merasa semula..
berharap ia takkan pergi,
sukar benar menerima hakikat kelupaan ini...

mengenang memori yang ku cipta sendiri,
hati ini tiba-tiba digamir rindu.
betapa aku berharap aku mampu mewujudkan rasa itu semula..
betapa aku berharap aku mampu menyayangi wajah itu semula,
betapa aku berharap untuk merasai rasa rindu pada gelak tawa itu semula..
namun aku juga terpaksa mengalah,
hati ini sudah tawar untuk terus mengharap..
jiwa ini sudah penat merawat luka yang tiada kesudahan..
pintu ini kembali tertutup rapat,
mata ini sudah penat untuk terus meratapi 'kesakitan' tiu..
yang sudah tu sudah.
KAU takkan pernah untuk aku miliki...
kita...takkan pernah dijodohkan bersama.

I close my eyes and I PRAY.. :'(

2011-03-11T23:29:00.004+08:00

Heyya girls and guys :)
Hows ya doing?
Everything great? huh? :))

Btw got a LOAD of story to tell for today,
but which one to start eh? :(
okay lah, to be honest with you guys,
today isnt really a good day foe me...
*sigh* why suddenly I feel so depressed? :'(

Yeah, this whole week is a GREAT beginning...
My office is totally DONE! Like finally :D
but then, the task is increased...
it still okay.
On the second day, got "Executive talk" at 8am..
Ghosh, I forgot bout it! O.o
Just realx in my room till Abang Bob ask me bout it -.-
Luckily juga lah dia ask bout that...

To be honest, the second day was super-fine day! :D
I met Kak Noreen, the PA for En Zulkiflie PEB,
whoaa honestly she looks young meehhhhh :)
I mean I thought she's maybe same with Kak Mazz,
but now I know she just maybe 4-8 years away from ME :D
Still young uhhh...hehehehe
Look at the PEB's staff?
Then I should know HE's also in here kan? ;P
Thats why lah i wanna wait for him,
but sangat keciwa when I've to make a move before He's from the hall :(
So...I made a very slow motion to make sure I can see HIS face..
Sangat keciwaaaaa :'(
It still OKAY. :)))

Now went for lunch.
Eat alone cause everyone is went tout to took their child at school.
Ahhh now Im jealous-ing them! :(
Haha when I can have all the moment? ;P
Finish the food, meet abang ijai, the Gatal-Man :P
SO gatal uhh... pantang jumpa mau kacau!
Orang cakap, nak gurau, ada batas right?
Kalau untill I feel sangat rimas, then how? :S
Teruss saja gerak cause I really dont know how to avoid him.
Waaaait! Ghosh, I saw someone walk to the door! O.o
OMG is that what I want all this while? *surprise*
Ghosh, look at the smile, so sweet kan? :D
He always like that laa...
making me moreee melt day by day! *dreamy-mode*
Even HE cdidnt realize me,
I guess his assistant knowing me =.=
just look at the way he stare at me! *gulp*
thats what I call as SUPERB DAY!! :D

then on the next day,
*sigh* got meeting with Finance Department, (Asset Unit)
All about the Assets...
It was oaky for the ferst day...
but today, Im starting to feel the pressure!
The problem is begin.
they dont accuse me for that responsibility,
but the questions which is burdened.
How to get the answers eh?
HIS mistake, and now, Im the one who have to take the burden.
*sigh* Just be strong amirah... :'S

And for this weekend,
I've to go to the office and...
did the 5S program!
Wait. Evryone is gone.
Johor, Penang. and fun with the family.
But me? Kerja?
Ya Allah, tabahkan hati ku... :'(

K. Hopefully I wouldnt do nothing yang impossible eh?
Pressure oh pressure..go away!
I want to do my job faithfully...

Hey hey hey! I didnt tell ya bout those PEB punya leader lagi kan? ^^
Waaaait! I meet En Zul today know? :P
Ghosh, He's so handsome meehh...
No wonder ahh why he's idolized by many girls :)
He's almost 40s know? But he's too charming! heheee
**eyy my ones still the most eh? ;P
En Shahrir pun even handsome,
not so charming like him :P
Handsomeeee but cant beat En Zul :D
En Shahrir is the 'sempoi' one..
En Zul? He's the soft one... baik, lemah lembut je..
Unlucky lah En Zul got 'brothers' like En F and En Shahrir! LOL
Both are too bising for him! :P
jangan marah eh bro? XD
and En Shahrir wearing Baju Melayu today! O.o
I thought U nak masuk meminang I... hahahaha :P
Melampau sehhh amirah! :D
But today got so many eh? yang wearing Baju Melayu..
The tradition..dont question it pleaseee :)

Capricorn :)

2011-03-06T12:16:00.006+08:00

Actually, I'm not really believe this predictions.
But something similar with my character just now..
So, I post this, not because I'm totally believe this,
but because I want you to know,
this is ME.
**it just accidently similar, dont misunderstand :)

* a predictable, reliable and practical.

* err i'm not so sure if I really a patient & tolerant person, but yes I do have a very deep internal requirements in terms of emotional and material. But dont worries, I wont tell anybody if I want it. It just my internal desire. Emotional desire, I do hurt if I dont get it, but it still ok and I believe, it was a DESTINY. Material desire? Yup, it's totally not a matter if I cant have it tho.. ;)

* Productive and persistent spirit that accompanied the caution to make her capable of achieving success in business. (this one, let the God do it)

* The natural of quiet, shy and calm face often hide my wisdom and intelligence. :P So dont be surprise if you meet me and you can totally believe that I'm super-quiet person, I do write a lot but speak less. :)

* My anger are controlled. And I'm very difficult to get angry. The need to strengthen are often carried away in a relationship that's very conservative, moderate and serious. Its mean that I'm taking ones relationship seriously! So dont play-play with me eh? ;) **and please dont take advantage on me.. :S**

* It's not that easy for me to show my caring but yea, I was a loyal and competent lover. And I guess, thats why I'm so hard to tell people that I love them :S

* Dreams and aspirations are the most important thing in my life. I'm also willing to do anything to fulfill it. The positive attitude to achieve success in life rite? ;p

* LOVE also being very valuable in my life but maybe because my character always want someone who makes me perfect that makes me difficult to find the truly ones. :'S

* Me also make difficult to trust others. In FRIENDSHIP, friends are very IMPORTANT for me & I really appreciate every friendship that established. But honestly, I'm very secretive amongst friends. I'm not a person who is easy to share a secret with others, even closest friends of my own. Perhaps it is a natural attitude of mine. Not because I'm fear the secret will be revealed. But I'm worry it will be a burden for them :(

* I'm also very fond of thinking deeply about things that happened. In other word, I'll take time before doing an action in order not to regret in the future. Sounds like I'm proud with myself, but NO. That is the real me. I mean, I really like to damning the brain to think what has happened in the past & its relation to the present. So, dont be surprised if you see me staring. Because I just love thinking about what causes such things happen even though it just happened in 2 seconds ago. (@__@)

* Actually, when they said Capricorns will argue with success. I think..NOT. I mean I'm the one who 'like' to argue but will never speak what I'm arguing about. But finally, I will show you that you are not doing as well as you think you are. (: And I always right with that.. :P (like I said, think before do your action!)

* Thinking deeply about problem? Be careful Amirah sweety, situations that would terrify an ordinary mind are merely problems need to be managed.

* Too afraid to express feeling dear Amirah? *sigh* Then I needs to acknowledge my feelings, just like Cancer, to stay connected to those who I support. :S

* Hahaha K. Sounds like pride but they said, as a Capricorn, everyone knows that I'm extremely bright and my mind is quicker then most! O.o Err bright..yeah, maybe true..maybe not. But quicker? Urgh. I guess lembab sikit kot :P hehehe

* As a Capricorn, they said I've a certain class and style about that that drives people crazy. K then, I hope its F. :P hehehehe

* I'm the producers of my own lives, so world, you better watch out! :D

* I feel best playing 'the game' safe, since this is a fail-safe way to get to the top eventually.

*The enthusiasm is slow to awaken, but it's one of the kind that grows and gathers force through coming into touch. ;)

* Better for you to know, Im usually has a strong sense of the desirability of fixed standards of conduct. heheee

* Hmm sounds so bad but yeah, Im the one who isnt an easy type to analyze and it's consequently difficult to sum up others characteristics briefly.

* Sorry to say, but Im not proud k? You've to know that I tend to help the rest of my friends to stay real. So, no matter how much you dislike a ME, remember that I'll always be a leader. ;P K. Just kidding (on the last sentence yea?) I dint mean it :)

FN : Actually what I tell ya right now is not because I believe all this sign. But because I accidently found this and kebetulan, what the sign said, similar with my attitude now :) Just post it to show you who I am. Dont misunderstand k?

I'm The ONLY girl in the world! :D

2011-03-04T22:51:00.002+08:00

K. Lame -.-" Hahaha
Dontcha think that was too much? :P

Okay. now we start yea?
ASSALAMUALAIKUM EARTHLINGS! :D

How's your day?
Everything was good?
Hey heyyy enjoy every moment you had eh?
You'll never know which one you gonna miss someday :')
**cheyy already good on giving advice eh?hehehe**

Well, past is past..
Do turn back to learn from it but dont walk with it :)
Haha sounds random but yea, I do learn a lot from the past..
Thanks God for giving me such a valuable experiences! :'D

And today is FRIDAY!!
ouhh my Godddd... hahaha didnt realize it! -.-
as you know, my office totally DONE!! :D
Just nak touch-up sikit-sikit **err office pun kena touch up eh? :P**

By the way, since I sit in my own room,
I separate 'far' bit from my sister. hehehe
So, on negative side, I'll meet the Abang F randomly :(
K. So sad laa.. when think bout that :P
**angau**

Hey hey hey!! talking bout HIM,
guess what??
He suddenly made appearance in front of me!
Huh, without any notice and sign uhh -.-"
But it so sweet and really made my whole FRIday! ;D

Like always, with his super-sweet smile and his canine tooth,
He passing the door step very slowly to me (in the counter) :D
OMG. We're wearing the same color!
And with the same design of fabric? O.o
Babe!! I'm melting right now!! :')))
Ghosh, he sempat jeling-ing at my nametag at that time,
I can saw his eye jeling it! hehehehe
Like always, he jalan-ing with his assistant laa -.-
hahaha so cute eh? how come we wear the same? janji eh? Ops! :P

HIM : Nak jumpa En bad.. dia ada?
ME : (my eyes was on his eye, freeze for awhile) Err pergilah, dia ada..

You know when you saw someone in their eyes,
and they also did the same to us,
the WORLD totally freeze for a seconds? :D
OMG! Dont tell me I'm crazy in love right now?! *blushing*
Well, ya know what?
Wen he jeling-ing at 'here'..(pointing at the nametag)
I feel like..a laser had shot my heart! :S
Ghosh, my heart beat super-fast!
It was a second time happen after my ferst love dulu :(
whoaa feels so crazy!! :D

Now, what's happening today,
is the 'repeat' of what's happening on our ferst metting dulu :')
God, it's a FLASHBACK!! :)
How I miss that moment when he ask the same question in the same place!
Hahaha err I guess he remember it too?
Thats why ahh he walk so slow when look at me?
Like a deja vu eh? hahaha :P
Then before he balik,
He give his super-sweet smile again to me! (^__^)
and now, I wonder why he always give that smile everytime
he close the boss's door?
err dont tell me that he may can guess my body language? :S
God, dont tell me that, pleaseeee :P

Honestly, at ferst, you will think yang he's a shy person,
but then, today he reveal everything!
He's cute with his assistant :D
Honestly, at ferst meeting,
you will think that he's a shy person,
randomly talk.
Only talk when needed.
But then, now you can see how bising-ness he was! hehehe
The way he talk tak ubah like.. alah,
I mean sembang macam budak-budak?
You know how meriah it was when budak-budak Uni talking in the group?
Err understand lah eh? hehehe

So till now memang dah gila..
The beat is still faster than ever :P
Hahaha God, you had fulfill my wish since a few days ago,
everything I want, you give...
Can you fulfill one more wish?
I wanna dream bout HIM for tonight, puhleaasshh :P
Pleash pleash puhleasshh!! *begging*

"Want you to make me feel like I'm the only girl in the world
Like I'm the only one that you'll ever love
Like I'm the only one who knows your heart
Only girl in the world...
Like I'm the only one that's in command
Cuz I'm the only one who understands how to make you feel like a man
Only girl in the world...
Girl in the world...
Only girl in the world...
Girl in the world..."
--Rihanna,Only Girl--

The LOVE that we share..

2011-02-28T23:45:00.005+08:00

Heyyaaa!
It has been a long time eyy after my last post bout daily routine rite?
K. My emotion is a bit 'emotional' these days...
Hopefully, all of ya have a great 2011 yea? ;)

So now, lemme story a bit my 2011 :)
I know everyone have a blast year of 2010 rite?
Wanna share with me?
Do check out my facebook or my twitter to share yea?

K. Promote macam artis =.='
Forgot bout it...(but I really hope to hear it from y'all :D)

So, these past few days agak busy sikit :(
and my health condition pun a bit unstable...
My lips still pecah-pecah...
Luckily juga I got cream to protect my skin from the dust :)
Should I wish a BIG THANKS to SIMPLYSITI? :P hahahaha

By the way, a loadsa news been gotten since a few weeks ago.
So many surprise till I cant get up!
Freezzeee and I cant think anything.. :'(
Since last week, I got the BIG surprise,
but not as worse as now..

So I think what I got LASTWEEK were kept as a secret..
Nobody knows when the 'secret will be reveal,
but surely not now...
For me, I wanna let the things falls into its place.
Jangan desperate sangat, its going nowhere pun kan? :)
So ALHAMDULILLAH, I become more calm nowadays,
I totally rely on God, may He show me the true path and bless me :')
Well, PAST do teach me a lot!
PRESENT show me the real life that I'll go thru..
and hopefully FUTURE will bring me more light that I need :'D
And I know I should thanks to those who came into my life
whether from the past, now or maybe in the future..
You guys are so adorable!
No matter how hurt am I at that time, no matter how sick i was..
You had give me a lot to learned!
THANK YOU SO MUCH for the experience! :')

But thanks a lot to Wawa for our long convo tadi :')
You know how much I miss you, girl? :(
Macam-macam story naik...
then, another surprise for us :P
So, I just....wanna tell you yang I miss you dam much girlfie!
If our life's control have rewind button,
I wanna push that button and go back to past!
I wish we can be together like before...
Sharing the love together...
Now I'm missing the moments!
Hopefully you are doing well hun!
Remember, ILOVEYOU forever girlfriends! ♥

***Honestly, I really miss my PAST,
but I dont want to skip even a step away from PRESENT...
This is the best way to grab my FUTURE. :'S
God, give me the clues...

It's LOVE because it HURT..

2011-02-22T23:37:00.001+08:00

Everyone see me laught...
Everyone see me smile...
and everyone thought I am HAPPY.
If only they knew how much I suffer right now...
If only they knew how pain my soul is crying right now...
and if they knew how suffer I was when trapped between past&present..

'Those memories' are so difficult to remove...
I was too tired to begs,
I was too tired to persuade,
why you dont want to go, my past?
Did you know that I suffer?
Did you know how much pain I've survive?
Did you know that too much scars in this heart?
Then..how much suffer you want me to survive moreee?
How many scars you want to carve moreee?
How much blood is needed to hurt me some moreee?
Tell me! And whyyyy? :'(

I've my present now...
the time has come for me to leave the road,
and move on to the other road...
BUT...I've to admit that I felt so difficult to leave that road...
The road that crave a thousands memories of sweet and bitter!
and you too, you dont want me to leave you, right?
But why?
Let me go...
Let me have a new life..
Let me have a new love..
I need truly HAPPINESS from someone who truly LOVES me..
I need truly LOVE from someone who truly CARES bout me..
Dont stop me,
even my heart feel so difficult,
I know that someday,
I can let go of YOU...
But for now,
please leave me alone...
I need to stay away from YOU..
I need to learn walking away from YOU and no turn back to YOU.
and I need, really need to stop LOVING you.. :(

The time has come, Amirah...
You just need someone to help you get out from the wounds.
Give someone a chance to help you.
Accept that, not everything we need will become mine.
Its all about DESTINY.
God already know who's the BEST for you..
Dont be rush, Amirah...
lets the thing falls into its place :')
anyhow, thanks for the MEMORIES, man..
Honestly, you're such a good guy and sweeet! :)
and that thing I will never forget :D
I know, you dont want to hurt me,
its a FATE want to show us how we're not belong together.
Let the people think what they want.
I know who you truly are...
Keep your heart on the road and be happy with that girl.
Cheer her life up and make sure, dont makes her hurt..
Both of you, I prays for the best.
May God bless both of you and...
may your relationship remain till the end of your breath! :'D

Selamat Ulang Tahun Sayang..

2011-02-15T23:00:00.004+08:00

SELAMAT ULANGTAHUN SAYANG-SAYANG, ALIFF AZIZZZZZ :D

Wow, you're turning into 20!
Welcome to the club boooyyyy :))
Basically, im proud of you.
You're so cool, down to earth and so chill to handle
all the obstacles that you've to face..
Errr actually, got something I wanna 'discuss' with you,
Okayyy..maybe Im too honest rite?
But yea, hopefully, you'll have a FRUITFUL year thru out your age!
May God's Mercy always be with you,
and I pray a load to see your journey
become more and more smooth after this :')
My advice, keep in with your personality..
Make sure NOTHING can change and destroy you..
Another confession?
No need to say in here,
let bygone be bygone...
I dont want to create another conflict in my life..
Thanks for all your kindness dear ♥

Yang tulus ikhlas
Ingin sekali sekala dirinya dibalas
Walau hanya dengan dakapan di angin lalu

Yang selalu memberi
Ingin sekali sekala jadi penerima
Cukup dengan salam dan manis doa

Aku ingin kau merasakan hebatnya cinta
Dan leburkan saja serpihan calar derita

Selamat ulang tahun sayang
Kini kau bersayap, pergilah terbang
Rentaslah langit cita cita mu
Harap nanti kita 'kan bertemu

Selamat ulang tahun sayang
Janganlah engkau tak terbang pulang
Ku nanti penuh kerinduan
Selamat tinggal, selamat jalan

Aku hanya inginkan engkau setia
Kerana setia yang mencipta bahagiamu

**Just so you know,
I tried my best to let go of you,
but I failed!
and I know,
I'm strong enough to walk away from you,
but I'm broken enough to look back on you..

The Letter I Couldn't Sent...

2011-02-09T23:20:00.010+08:00

[Ku cintainya kerana cara dia
Sungguh berbeda dari yang telah ku jumpa
Renungan dia tulus merasuk jiwa
Hingga terasa terus ke hati
Ku cintainya kerana kesungguhannya
Bukannya kata-kata semata-mata
Perwatakannya mengatakan segalanya
Buatku percayakan janjinya
Ku akui aku menggilainya
Ku akui aku menyintainya
Kisahku kisah dia
Cerita yang sama
Setiap detik hanya dia
Ku akui aku mengaguminya
Ku akui aku menyayanginya
Sungguhnya ku akui ku perlukan dia
Segalanya kuserah kepada dia
Cintai dia bersama mimpi-mimpinya
Cintai dia juga segala caranya
Cintai dia bersama keanehannya
Cintai dia hanya dia]

----CTKD-------

A long time ago, I always fantasize that one day, I will sing this song for you. I know my voice isn't melodious, but enough for me to feel happy and satisfied if you're willing to accept it.

But that thing is just a fantasy story that occurred since the last 2 years.. yeah, I only late one year of the story of you and her. You'll never know how much hurt I've to survive for all this years.. you'll never know many tears away just because of you. And you'll never know how crazy am I everytime I saw your face :'(

Now, I think, this song just make wounds become deeper. I've to face the fact that you're not belong to me. I need to learn to accept God's destiny. There must be something that God keep for me because He's not answering my prayer.

When I was about to reach the end of the road, the road that filled with darkness and tears, I looked back. And I saw how much my tears are flowing, how much hurt that I encountered before arriving at this finish line. Basically, I felt so sick and tired thru this 'path'. However, I feel more pain when the time finally comes, the path ends and I've to start the new road.

Felt like dripping tears when I moved to the next path. How many sweet and bitter memories had passed, and now, I have to get ready again to walk on a new path. Hopefully it will be smoother and less complicated than before. First path will remain in memory. Let the past remain challenging and memorable, because it would be healing my wounds in the future. :')

What I want you to know is you'll remain in my memory. You remain as the most beautiful memories. Loving you was a beautiful experience that will not be affordable to everyone, and not everyone will appreciate it. Despite its bitter like a gall, it's still the most beautiful memory. I'll be remembered always, forever.. at least I know, you're the most beautiful love in my life.

♥♥♥And now, this song isnt for you anymore. I'll dedicate this song specially for him. He's the one who make my heart is restless as ever you did before. I'm wishing him every day. He's a guy who makes these longing more flammable. He, despite his presence in silence, but only him, who succeeded in opening up new path and moving me out from the path that full of thorns. And this song, very special, for him, who's successfully steals my heart.♥♥♥

"There's a lot of things in life you have to work hard to get.
And sometimes,
its the same things that you must learn to LET GO."

I go CRAZY because of YOU...

2011-02-07T22:54:00.003+08:00

Once I fell in love, I will love him forever.. my expectations, this love wont fade eventho many obstacles had to be faced. Thats what happen 2 years ago when I fall in love with AA. At that time, im still a 'kid'.. for me, I just love him as a friend.. funny when im the one yang kutuk dia at ferst I saw him. But that doesnt mean yang I hate him.. it just 'kutuk-kutuk manja' know? Everything was change I know you already have someone special. Is it hurt? Yup, it takes a long time for to heal the wound... not a few days, not a couple month but a few years! My hope for you never fade. Every second of my life, I always pray, someday, i'll have a chance to be with you, (eventho it just 0.001%) who cares? Love's blind, rite? You will never know how many tears away just because of you... you'll never know how many times this wound bleeding everytime its hurt.. and if you can look into my heart, you'll see the heart is broken because of terrible pain!

Suddenly, FR comes into my life. He come not to catch me.. but he came just as a friend.. is it too early for me to realize that im falling in love with him? Ops! terlepas.. :P too early for me, besides, i didnt know him that well.. im just knowing him since a month ago. Oh yeah.. love's blind. I forgot bout it.. =_= to be more honest, yeah, im crazy on him! Is it a mistake? Sometimes I feel yes, but sometimes I feel yang, no wrong with that feeling kan? One thing you should know. When Im turning into 20years old, ferst thing that across my mind is....how many years i've been wasted for a guy who not just not knowing who's me, but I even dont have a chance to be with him! *sigh* maybe God still not answering my prayers yet. Yeah, in this case, patience needed. But honestly, after he came, I guess your face starting fade from my mind... im trying harder to not letting you go, but yeah... fate is fate rite? And I've to accept yang whatever happen, you're very happy with her. And me? Still here wait for nothing... im sorry... yeah, sometimes God knows which the BEST for us, and I guess I need to stop this crazy love now. You wont know it. You even notice it. It just killing me day by day. Im better taking my own way and not looking to you anymore. Im tired. I've been too hurt before, hurt because of my own stupidity. Loves someone who cant love me in return. Hope for someone who even didnt know that I need that chance. I.Need.To.Stop. :'(

Lemme tell ya,now is not about love.. its still bout HEART. Starting this year, they both keep interfering my heart. Dont know why, can I say that im stuck between AA and FR? Yup, im stuck between the both of them! :'S so hard when you have to accept the one you love a long time go, has come the time to 'go'... and his place, maybe will replace FR.. heyy I've to accept too, that im starting to like FR. Its not that im not love him.. but before this, i remember him moree as an executive officer. In other words, just as a staff & boss (not a BIG boss cause 'we' got another BIG boss above us) he still young and charming. Anak dato... but like kakaks said, a-handsome-cute guy like him, is so hard to 'control'.. girls will always looking at him whether he's single or 'double'! :P do i need to surrender ferst before im hurt for the second time? :S you should know how deep I falls when I hope for someone to catch me up... but no one... :( Im hoping and really hope, God will answered my prays in future.. maybe He has a good plan and better than Me...

**I hope I can stop dreaming bout FR tonight. it has been a few days after my prayers.. :S

Once upon a time... :p

2011-02-02T00:19:00.005+08:00

How do I start?
And what a beautiful words to immortalized?
Every face tells,
Every song means,
Which is inspired me?

the light in your eyes ..
the smile on your lips ..
carved a thousand question marks,
maybe you're also in these passion?
at this time am I miss you?

a hundreds letter sheets are in front of me.
I cannot send...
I squeezed with my hands and I throw away out of sight...

But I regret..!
I collect it back..
I cannot state what I think,
If you know what's in my heart,
Could you answer my soul scream?

Listen to my calling ...
Listen to my song for you ...
Oh wind, please convey my longing that burns to him!

My colors of love,
Has faded with the night darkness ..
Do you feel what I feel?
Or you dont even bother?

But I believe all have been written ..
And my good intentions will not be in vain ..
And at one time,
In a beautiful day,
I lent my hands,
Then you grasp...

Because I'm Stupid... you... :S

2011-01-30T11:19:00.002+08:00

I know of no one other than you,
you’re looking at someone else,
yet you have no idea of my feelings like this..

I won’t be in your days,
I won’t be in the memories either,
however only you, I looked only at you!
and the tears keep coming..

As I watch you walking past, I’m still happy..
even yet you still don’t know my heart,
I should stop this and go...

I really want to see the day,
I’m withstanding the pain each day,
“I love you” is playing on my lips..
Alone once again, crying for you..
Alone once again, missing for you..
Baby,
I love you, I’m waiting for you

I won’t be in your days..
I won’t be remembered either,
however only you, I looked only at you!
I’m making memories alone..

Loving you is like having a beautiful wound :')
I look at your pretty smile also,
but I cannot laugh with you.. :(

I’m thinking about you so much everyday!
my heart is hurting in all these sad days!
‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips...
Alone once again, crying for you..
Alone once again, missing for you..
Baby,
i’m waiting for you, I love you

"bye bye" never say goodbye..
even though I cannot hold you like this,
I need you!
I cannot say anything more, I want you!
I keep on hoping too, I’ll keep hoping...

I really want to see the day,
I’m withstanding the pain each day...
“I love you” is playing on my lips..
Alone once again, crying for you..

I’m thinking about you so much everyday!
my heart is hurting in all these sad days!
‘I want to see you’ is playing on my lips..
alone once again, crying for you..
alone once again, missing for you..
Baby,
i’m waiting for you, I love you.. :'(

Love? :'S

2011-01-26T21:02:00.003+08:00

So it was true what people said, age is a measure of maturity. Neurons may cause the body change as a result of this maturity. Yup. I really can feel the change. It may also due to the surrounding factors, right? I work in an environment that's basically, less healthy. You certainly understand how the nature of the Malays, right? Always great in PhD lessons! =.= Indeed, those attitude and character that I found that makes me mature. (:

Bukan nak kata... but since I turn into 20 years old on Jan 17th ago, I'm thinking moreee about future and 'why' with the past? For those yang read my blog since awal akan tahu what I've done in the past and now, I feel like......I'm so regret! Dont know how to explain in here, but I try...

Sikap I dah lain.. now, I love sitting on chair, stare and think everything happen now, yesterday and what will happen tomorrow. What was the reason with those yang happen yesterday, today and tommorow? Maybe some of you dah biasa with the situation, but as a girl yang turn into an adult, I can feel the change. Yelah.. before this, I ni agak kebudak-budakkan. What we're called that? Immature minded.. hehee I banyak follow perasaan berbanding instinct. I banyak guna hati daripada guna akal. But now, I banyak fikir guna akal dari hati, I banyak berfikir about perasaan yang banyak made mistakes than insticnt.

Actually, my last post pun ada cakap sikit about that thing cuma... I dont know! I feel like.. I wanna explain moreeee bout it! Maybe depressed dengan perasaan sendiri kot? :( Oklah, actually I rasa macam nak express something but dont know where's the better place. I guess here is better. Just hope what happen in the past few years, not happen today eh? :S Cukuplah.....

At the midnight of Jan 17th. I mean at 12 in the morning of Jan 17th, I suddenly terfikir... kenapa I bersusah-payah teringatkan dia sedangkan at the same time, HE never remembering me? And maybe... HE never know me? You know what? I've been wasting a loadsa time just to keep my mind and my heart for him. 3years... is not a bit time untuk cintai DIA... it such a great time to wasted! =.= Why wasting time for someone who's nothing for me? Ops. No! He's everything to me but I'm nothing to him! :'( Waste kan? Betul-betul waste!

But kenapa I never thought that before? Tau apa yang I feel just now? I rasa...terseksa sangat! Kenapa? Because everytime I remember him, I (finally) realize yang actually I had forgotten him dah lama... But I dont know accurately lah when I started forgetting him. Yang I tahu, sekarang, kalau all of you suruh I remember him, I akan cakap, I've no such feeling towards him anymore! Habes? Apa yang buat I terseksa? Sebab hati I degil... everytime I realize yang I actually has no feeling to him, I akan deny that thought. Deep into my heart,I tau yang I dah lupakan dia. If dulu, I MUST cry everytime saw his face, now? Nak cakap dengan dia pun.. dah malas. Tapi luaran hati I keep saying yang I wont forgetting him. My love is still there.. still need him in my life! *teary* I rasa ia satu beban yang sangat menyakitkan. Ok. Now I've to tell you, memang I still 'sakit' everytime saw him with the girl tapi.. sakit dia tak macam dulu. The pain is not the same macam yang I feel past few years and a month ago... kelakar, when I think yang I just pretend to be sick.. teruk sangatkah? :S

Teruuuk..sampai I terfikir, I just pretend? Ouch, so terrible! Actually not.. yang terrible tu me myself. Dont you think I'm so stupid bila I try nak hurting myself? When I said yang "I just pretend", actually I try harder to make myself hurt! *sigh* Cintaku padamu hanya membuat aku bertambah gila! So conclusion. I need to stop this crazy thing. Cukuplah 'A'.. I dah penat sayangkan you... sedangkan I tahu you dah ada orang lain, sedangkan I tahu, you sendiri tak pernah kenal siapa I. I just waste my 3years keeping those 'love' for you. But before this, I tak terfikir pun... sebab apa yang I tau, I cuma nak sayangkan you. I just want to LOVE you. And thats why I tak pernah buka hati to anyone. Bukan takde orang yang nak, bukan juga sebab I jual mahal, tapi sebab I love you too much till I swear, I can be in this situation (alone) forever asalkan my love for you were not fade. Biarlah kalau you nak kahwin dengan sesiapa, I never care..(even I'm hurt). Most importantly, I nak tengok you happy. Your smile (even when with her) is enough to brighten up my days.. enough untuk I 'bawa' you ke alam mimpi :')

Tapi itu dulu... thats not mean, I dah tak support you. Till the end of my life, I will always give my full support and love for you. Just, bukan cinta atau sayang macam dulu. Sekadar cinta dan sayang seorang sahabat/kenalan/peminat. I'm sick jadi your dark lover... terlalu menyakitkan. I'm so grateful dalam usia yang mencecah 20 years old, I finally realize what I'm doing and... I realize yang you're not mine. And I even sedar yang untuk forever pun, kita takkan mungkin ada jodoh, sama ada jodoh untuk berjumpa atau jodoh sebagai kekasih. If meet you someday tuu, itu future kan? We didnt know what will happen. But kalau jodoh yang lain tu, I guess I want to stop it right now! It just.... too crazy! I need to rest especially my heart from thinking of you, I need breath and I need inhale everything about LIFE and exhale anything about YOU. It worth. I'm so sorry...

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO ME!!

2011-01-17T00:04:00.001+08:00

Ghosh, I'm twenty already! :S
How adult I am! :)
Cant wait to become an adult!
Hope I can become a successful adult, graceful,
and loved by YOU! :D
Pray for me! LOL~ just kidding..

P/S : Heeyy, I've been tired known as teenagers . If you wanna say that I was old, I don't care... most importantly, I want to be an adult. I want a mature minded and I didn't want them called me raw girl! heheee
Correction : Not all of you called me like that, I'm just cannot wait to become an adult. Some of them thought I was a raw girl who can't do work. SO lemme prove them, k? ;)

Top 5 for ABPBH.

2011-01-13T22:58:00.000+08:00

Lists of top 5 for each category in the Popular Star Awards announced in a press conference yesterday.
Congratulations to the successful (elected) to the final. :D

The other celebrities who do not succeed,
we still have next time, right?
Don't despair...
most importantly, spend a lot of time with the fans,
only with this you can win their hearts,
so, you can make them vote for you!
K. Lame. LOL. -.-"

25th Juara lagu Awards

2011-01-11T23:01:00.000+08:00

YEAY!! Finally, these awards were held on 9th January 2011. Congratulations to all finalist who have made very excellent performance! Almost all of the performances are the best although there are some performers that are less prominent. I gave you a few videos taken from YouTube for your viewed. Not mine, ok? I just borrow them to put a link here. Thanks.

Comment : Yuna looks so pretty in this performance!. Congratulations on singing this song so well. :) Btw I love your dress Miss Yuna! :D

Comment : Tomok performance that night was great. His style, especially the use of eyeliner, you do have the potential to be Adam Lambert Malaysia! LOL. Just kidding .. ok? -.-" However, Mr Tomok, your hard work to dance in this 'Berlari' show was highly praised. Really! I'm very excited to see you dance, and I really hope I can see you dancing again in the future! heheee! Remember, brother Tomok .. :P

Comment : Actually, I've long been worried about Shahir. I also have expected he would be difficult to perform that night. Honestly, this is not his best performance. Not that he's performing badly, but the show wasn't good enough. I'm sure he could do better. Sorry, yes, I'm a fan of you, but I was somewhat less satisfied with the performance.

Comment : Heyy I'm so sorry, I'm not into this indie music performance :( And unlucky, I just watch it when the performance is near to the ending. However, those A.P.I, Azlan & The Typewriter also HUjan give their best performance! It just no luck... you still have a chance on the next awards rite? ;)

Comment : This one, I really love! LOL. Just imagine how my heart beats really fast when you see him falls on the stage! I though, maybe because he moves too active, (well, you know, he just had an accident, my heart is restless since he begin his performance). Hey you! You know or not, Mr.Hafiz? I almost cried because I'm afraid something happen to you! And suddenly ..... he appeared from behind the scenes .. I was very surprised and angry! (supposedly laa.. actually not :P ) LOL. Your gimmick, I'll never forget that scene forever. ;P

Comment : Honestly, I admit Ana performance isn't very clear, (it's not about unclear purpose, but it's not clear from sound system). However, she still managed to give an effective performance to the audience. Just, I was so upset when she's accused not deserved to win the award. This judging are by the juries, not based on popularity. The juries has reason why the song won, don't curse or despise her. She, herself was never expecting the victory will belong to her. :(

Comment : I guess this is the sweetest performance I ever seen! hehee I swear it was too sweet and A big congratulations to our Superman Malaysia for an outstanding performance! :D I want this video pleaseeee :P (psstt.. I love it when the part he pull up his voice!)

Comment : Basically, the presentation is very good, Adira. Just a bit standard. I mean, quite simple compared to other performers. But doesn't matter, right? Performance is not counted, (although there's the Best Performance Award) what's important, her vocals is so great at that night! Congratulations! You vocals are very strong! *clapclap*

Comment : Original. Without any make-up. They looks so charming, isnt it? ;)

Comment : (Ok, I take comments from the youtube website on this video and best vocal award-winning speculative.)
"Amy was one of the jury for the best vocal. But why did not he choose Black? I think maybe because of 'Noktah Cinta' more difficult to sing. From low notes to high notes very quickly. Sofea Jane, standard song that can be more vocal when singing slowly. 'Noktah Cinta' if we don't have a voice control will be destroy. I think that is the advantages of Hafiz. He had a good voice control for music like this. It does not mean Black is not good. He's good, but he still not reaching the standard vocals controls such as Hafiz on a song."
(Believe it or not, she had give the best comment and explaination why Hafiz deserve the Best Vocal Award)

Comment : This performance deserve the Best Performance Award! He really brave to make this gimmick know? LOL~ And suddenly, I remember how someone said "This is Hanyut, not lemas song" heheee Anyway, congratulations Faizal! :D

Comment : I just love the chemistry between Noh and his fiance, Mizz Nina :P Yup, both have great cooperation and sehatisejiwa! :D Good luck for you both!

I dont think I have to show you the opening/closing performance from the winner of Juar Lagu since 1985, right? It just the winners. You can search them on Youtube :)
Those performance was held by M.Nasir, Francisca Peter, Datuk Sharifah Aini, Dato Siti Nurhaliza, Ziana Zain and etc.
By the way, this is the list of the winner for 25th Juara Lagu ::

Juara Anugerah Juara Lagu ke-25,
Tolong Ingatkan Aku, Ana Raffali

Naib Juara AJL25
Drama King, Meet Uncle Hussein feat. Black

Tempat Ke-3 AJL25
Noktah Cinta, Hafiz

Juara Vokal Terbaik AJL25
Hafiz, Noktah Cinta

Juara Persembahan Terbaik AJL25
Faizal Tahir, Hanyut

*** My advice, let them who know about the greatness of music evaluating other musicians. Let us observing, commenting, but not to exceed the bounds of humanity.
It's a tradition in competition, there would be a winners and a losers. But remember, the losers is till the winner :)

Welcome 2011 :) Goodbye 2010 :(

2011-01-01T01:11:00.001+08:00

May all of us continue to succeed and hope the light will illuminate along the path :)

To mom and dad, I ask a pardon if I made something wrong in your eyes, or maybe I raise my voice with no conscious, I really hope there's a forgiveness to me.

To other family members, including brothers, sisters, aunties, uncles, granny, nephew and niece, I also ask a forgiveness for my time to be together is running out. I wish I still had a chance to spend time with you all.

To all my friends in the regionwide, I know the 2010 is very wonderful year for you guys. I always pray and hope that success and happiness will continue to illuminate your 2011. :')

For those who I really love :: AliffAziz, KimHyunJoong, KimKyuJong, GDragon, Key, and Baby KimHyungJun.. Hopefully the success will continue to shine your career and I always pray that all my beloved would have continued to capture the world till the end of the life. :D

To the 'someone', I really hope there's a space for us to discuss about what's in my mind right now. I really wish we can face-to-face conversation or at least, you're ready to reply all my message so that we can clear up all these negative things. Deep into my heart, I hope there's forgiveness to me if I did something wrong to you. Please don't keep silent and judge me like this. :'(

What can I say, in 2010, bring more suspicion and bitter to me to swallow, compared to the sweetness and happiness. However, the sweetness still appear at the end of these phrase even slightly contaminated with a very deep wound. But God is very fair. Just look how I ended 2009 with a thousand of bitterness I have to swallowed, and now, in 2010, I ended with a thousand of sweetness memories in it. As well as the end of 2008 I covered the 1001 of sweetness. Isn't it so fair? I still consider 2010 is very wonderful year and I really hope, that the sweetness at the end of 2010 will continue, at least until the end of 2011. That's what I expect. Wishing 2011 brought me a power to face a thousands people around me.

HAPPY NEW YEAR 2011

p/s : dont forget to dropping by at our newbrands Aliff Aziz website :)

Happy Birthday Dear Brother :)

2010-12-30T01:48:00.000+08:00

He is so annoying
He is so sad
He drives me crazy
He makes me wanna go mad.

He makes my father constantly yell
He makes my mother cry
He makes me wanna go die sometimes...

He is crazy
He is nuts
And sometimes I wanna grab him and choke him til' he goes nuts!

Someday I won't have my brother
and I wish that day will never come
because I know, without him,
I will nor be the same :')

Just remember,
my brother is so sweet!
in times of need, he is there

my brother is so responsible,
he taught me a lot of things.

my brother is so funny!
we even teared from laughing :D

my brother is so fierce!
don't mess with him when his angry..

my brother will go away someday...
I'm sad when i think of it!
but I know, my brother's heart is so good!
I know he will never forget me. :'D

HAPPY BIRTHDAY DEAR BABY BROTHER!! ♥

The Pictures (Part II)

2010-12-23T21:29:00.000+08:00

Holidays in Pangkor.. \(^__^\)(/^__^)/
[18.12.2010-19.12.2010]

The Banana Boat, the BEST moment in my life! :D

Until the time we went to beach pun still baju kurung! :O

What they are doing up there?? -.-"

When the cousins acting hyper... :p

Vogue habeeess!! (^0^)

Menuuuuung cik kak? 8)

The dark nite... (^__^)

ABC.....DEFGHIJHKLMNOPQRSTUVWXYZ :P

Just a fried rice.. did she really on diet? -.-

Ni air KEPALA sedaaaaap wooookk!! :DD

Blahhhhh XD

Termenung cik adek ni nak pilih makan...

Pening pilih menu ye ayah? ;p

See the ocean on my back?

BIGGGGGG ice cream! :P

Have a BIG ice cream! ^^

Sebab baru balik dari kenduri, go to pangkor with baju kurung! -.-

Why I'm the only one who look at the camera? :S

Spending time with cousins at weekends :)
[12.12.2010]

I won this DragonBear and I call him GD! (@__@) hehehehe

Seems like a real beach kan? ;)

I dont know what they're trying to do! -.-"

Dinner at Paparich :)
[11.12.2010]Amirah & Nadrah.

I dont know why he sudeenly mad at me :(

Roti Bakar Susu! ^^

Milo Dinasour! :D

The Pictures (Part I)

2010-12-22T22:38:00.002+08:00

The Picnic.
[06.12.2010]

The Cousins :)

The Brothers ;)

Are you trying to hit my brother, sis? :P

Say chesse boys!!! ;D

Everyone look at to this cam! ^o^

Kim-Hyun-Joong-Love :D
[04.12.2010]

Look at how my brother pose on his favourote car :P

Adek is quite afraid with the clown actually.

The clown is so creative! He give me a flower, how sweet is that? ^^

And a gun for my brother? LOL.

B.O.R.I.N.G

Hold a moment on my love's shoulder :P
Tired eh waiting for him to finish his FM ;p

Look at there honey! :P

Spicy Rice Cake! I miss you :'(

aww spicy rice cake! :S

Adek eat Yuk Gae Jang with korean Soup! (^__^)

The Family Day :))
[27.11.2010 - 28.11.2010]

That slide door is a connection between cabin. How smart it is? (^__^)

What is brother doing at the back there? -.-"

Snaaap!! habes lah auntie&uncle tuuuu :P

Jeling ke mana tu adek? ;)

Chakkk!!! ngeheee~

I am looking on you babe! *twinks*

The Sisters (^__^)

Pavilion when Christmast comes...

Did you realize that this boy is so hard to smile? -.-

This is what happen when you force your feets to do smthn out of its ability! :(

Playing in Sultan Abdul Aziz Shah's Park :)

[28.11.2010]

The Loss of DearestTeacher... )':

2010-12-21T20:38:00.002+08:00

R.I.P PUAN AZLILY

My eyes filled up with tears as I heard the news.
It never occurred to me, how much I could lose.
I find myself wishing that it wasn't real..
Every time I think about it, pain is all I can feel
Tears fall from my eyes, I can barely see,
But my heart tells me that she'll always be with me
I’m glad she feels no pain now - she lives in a perfect land
I can still feel the soft touch on my shoulder of her loving hand.
I lie in bed and cry at night.
And I don’t feel any better in the morning light..
And I will love and miss her forever
Until the day we are again together.
Together in that perfect place above,
Filled with caring, sharing and love
But until that day comes - I will wipe my tears away.
And hopefully see you again someday.

Thank you dear teacher for all the knowledge that you have give on us. Without you, I wouldn't stand in a place I stand now. A thousands thanks to you, my teacher. Rest in peace. Our prayers, your former students, will always accompany you, teacher. May the spirit always under the mercy of God. May you placed in a heaven of God. Thank you so much teacher. :'(

AL-FATIHAH.

Happy Birthday and Soryyyyy

2010-12-20T19:59:00.004+08:00

ELOOOOOOOOOOO! (^__^)
How are you sweetheart?
Its quite a long time I'm not updating this blog, kan?
I mean, updating bout myself lahhh... :P
Many ads that interrupt here,
Vote for ALIFF AZIZ in ABPBH,
The video clip of Kalau Cinta...
and list of winners for GDA in Korean :)

Conclusion :
I just dont have much time to write ok?
So sorry bout it.

WAIT!
About ABPBH,
DONT FORGET DEAR ALIFFANGELS,
the deadline for voting is on DECEMBER 30th.
While the voting form must be submitted BEFORE January 6th, ok?
Vote for AA, Angels! Show your support and loves! (\^__^\)(/^__^/)

To my friends below, happy birthday!

FATIN NAJWA

ARDY SHAMIR

SYAFIQAH FARID

Into the dim lit, bare walls of my world,
You entered, bringing light and life to me,
The vivid colors, painted with a swirl
Of wit and charm, of personality,
With tender care, you added comfort, warmth,
And images that line the now bright walls.
I look upon them fondly, bringing forth.
A thankfulness that you walk in these halls with me;
our friendship has become a part of my world now;
it has its special place,
Within my being, my life, and in my heart,
Your name hangs right beside your smiling face.
Remembering just how drab these walls had been,
I HAVE TO THANK YOU FOR THE LIGHT, MY FRIENDS :)

who miss you very much;
AMIRAH

***Im sos sorry for late post, no time to update this :(

Golden Disk Award 2010

2010-12-10T22:12:00.006+08:00

Golden Disk Award 2010

GDA is a Korean version of Grammy Awards :)
Congrats to all winners.
Especially SHINee and SNSD who I heard won the most awards ^o^

Here's the list of winners :

Disk Bonsang Daesang
SNSD

Digital Music Daesang
2AM

Disk Bonsang winners
DJ DOC,
SHINee,
SNSD,
Super Junior,
BoA

Digital Bonsang winners
2AM,
IU,
Miss A,
CN Bluee,
Lee Seunggi

Newbie Awards of the Year
BEAST,
Secret,
Sistar

Ceci Popularity Awards
SNSD,
SHINee

MSN Asian Popularity Award
Super Junior

COSMOPOLITAN Rock Award
F.T Island

Hip Hop Award
Supreme Team

Producer Award
Hong Seung Sung

Again...

2010-12-02T23:02:00.002+08:00

( I think it's true... firstly I read of this statement, I was silent. trying to observe. When the time that I was 'most feared' came, I know, the first tears flow from the left side. Is that a sign of my pain? I guess yes... Crying? Anyone who read this, just YOU, me, and HIM knows how it all began..)

" I know I’m being too selfish wanting someone like you, yeah

The last words I want to say to you
Always come out differently than I plan
You were my everything
But your cruelty devastated me
You were everything to me
So your cold eyes tear me apart
I was the one being in the way, standing between you and her
Honestly, I think I did the right thing letting you go
But it’s still hurting deep inside
I don’t wanna love again..."

" Even though it's time for the seasons to change,
our love won't fade!
I wanted to express my feelings properly
in case we never see each other again "

" Tell me where you are
I closed my eyes and
try to remember your smile
And until now, I didn't realize
the enormous amount of loneliness I felt "

" I couldn't sleep again today,
so I greeted the morning's light
I called out your name over and over again
but you're not here "

" I don't need anything else, I just want you to come to me "

" the times with you, I think about keeping them all
but they're all scars
the nameless memories that have come "

" Even if you are far from where I am
If you should leave, you musn't tell me
I may be a fool but, I will not forget you
Your back turned is something I will never want to see
yet to say goodbye to you is something i could never do "

MTV and ABP :)

2010-11-27T23:34:00.005+08:00

Anugerah Bintang Popular 2010 nominations have been started!
And guess what??
Aliff Aziz is nominated in two categories! ^^
Whoa! My dreams become true? *smileverywidely*

Most Popular Male Singer Award

Most Popular Duo/Group Award

Yes, I was always dreaming,
one day, I wanna see AA nominated in several categories at the ABP.
I wanna see him walk across the red carpet,
I wanna see him holding the winning trophy,
and see how chaotic the halls when he's giving his victory speech!
I know my hope is too high but I swear I want to see it all happen.

Yes, I admit I was disappointed when in 2009 his name is not listed
at least as a candidate for the "Most Popular New Artist".
And when I saw his name nominated this year,
I slapped my cheek a few times, (hehehe)
Is it true what I read and see?
Ghosh, my dream really come true! *jumpingjoy*

GUYS, dont forget to catch his latest single
Official Music Video, KALAU CINTA!
Watch or you die! ;)

Aliff Aziz |MTV Music Malaysia

http://www.mtvmusic.my/artist/aliff_aziz/videos/599784/kalau_cinta
go to this link to watch the vid :)

Malaysian Certificate of Higher Education

2010-11-22T23:47:00.003+08:00

This post will definitely short. I don't want to write long like always. Just wanted to wish good luck for my friends in all over Malaysia who will face STPM tomorrow! Good luck and do the best! Two semesters, all of you struggling to gain knowledge, and now the time to fight! Remember God always, the face of both parents ... Hopes that they had put up on you. My prays, their prays, were always accompany you in this battle. Once again, all the best my friends!

The difference between a successful person and others is not because a lack of strength nor a lack of knowledge, but they are lack in a will.
- Vince Lombardi